Rent Boyz
by elfprincess8
Summary: Edward Cullen is a hard-core pimp on the streets of Indianapolis, IN. Jacob Black is a vulnerable run-away with no where to go. Edward takes him in and tries to force Jacob into that life. Can Jacob, with his innocent, kind heart, melt Edward's icy exterior or will Edward break Jacob and ruin his life too? Multiple pairings, dark, non-consensual, OOC.
1. Chapter 1

Rent Boyz

Chapter One

Authors Note: Warning, before you read, this fic is very dark. It will include graphic violence and non-consensual sex as it goes along. It is OOC and it might not have a HEA ending. If that is not your thing then don't read any further and flame me about it later. If you are brave, then by all means, enjoy!

The winter is cold in Indianapolis, Indiana. The wind can cut you as deeply as it does in more notorious climates like Chicago. I'd never been to Chicago. I doubted if I would ever go there. The farthest away from Indie I'd ever been was St. Louis. I liked St. Louis. Maybe someday I'd go back there.

I turned my collar up against the howling wind, impregnated with tiny crystals of ice that blew into my face and down the front of my shirt. I hated winter and winters in Indie are long. I was on my way back from the corner quick-stop where I'd purchased some cigarettes and a 6-pack. I planned to spend that night alone and inside. Nights like that night were not fit for working; no customers would be out during the storm.

I lived in an old, flop-house, type hotel on the east side. The place had once been nice, that was obvious but the current clientele were a mix of drug addicts, hustlers, dealers and pimps like myself. My name is Edward Anthony Cullen and I'm 28 years old. I've been in this life for as long as I can remember, my single mother being a prostitute, it was the only life I knew.

As I rounded the corner to the building, a shabby, derelict brownstone on a corner lot, I saw him crouched down between the front steps and a dumpster. He was young, that was obvious and he was cold, that was obvious too. He wasn't wearing a coat and had on only a thin, thread-bare hoodie and ripped-up jeans. His black Chuck Taylor's had seen better days. He had a decidedly Latin look about him with coal-black hair and dark skin. When I drew closer he looked up and I have to admit I was startled by his appearance.

He was almost perfect. The only flaws I could find were trivial at best. His black eyes were just a bit too deep-set and that hid his long lashes somewhat. The base of his nose was a little too broad for his face but it didn't take away from his appearance. The most alluring feature on him was that mouth. His lips were so soft and full looking that I found myself slightly aroused with the idea of kissing them.

That he was homeless was beyond question, what I would do about it, well, that was up for discussion. I ought to have just left him there. From the look on his face, he didn't expect anything from me. When I approached him, he lowered his head and wrapped his arms around his drawn up knees. He was shivering and shaking uncontrollably and he probably was quite hungry.

How many nights had I spent in similar circumstances in the past? I couldn't count them. Don't get me wrong, though. I felt no pity, no compassion for him, this nameless stranger alone and miserable in the cold. I had no idea what circumstances might have placed him there in my path and I didn't give a shit. When I looked at him, all I saw was a vulnerable kid that I could exploit. I saw the potential dollar signs and I knew that if I could get him to work for me, I'd have no trouble pimping him out.

I stood in front of him, my hands on my hips. "What's your name?" I asked him.

He didn't look up and for a moment I didn't think he would answer me. Perhaps he was a Mexican share-cropper come up during the sweltering summer months to help with the harvest down south. Maybe he'd just made his way up to Indie thinking he'd be able to stay. Perhaps he couldn't speak English.

After a long moment, he did look up, rather fearfully at me. "Jacob Black," he mumbled. So, he could speak English and fluently.

"How old are you?" I asked.

"Sixteen," he answered, still refusing to meet my eyes.

I didn't bother with the mundane questions. I didn't ask him what he was doing there. I didn't ask him why he'd run away or been cast out. Like I said, I could care less. I didn't want to hear his sob story, it meant nothing to me. I stepped away from him and headed toward the stairs. Then, at the last minute, I turned back.

"You coming or what?" I asked.

He got up, without saying a word and followed me into the building. Just inside the door sat a homeless, Vietnam War vet named Charlie Swan. I liked Charlie and I didn't like very many people. I admired a man who could fight and risk his life so the rest of us miscreants could walk free. I tossed the bum a couple bucks and headed up the dimly lit staircase.

We emerged in the upper floor of the 10 story building, the long hallway lit with the light from a couple exposed bulbs hanging from the ceiling by rusty chains. The peeling wallpaper and dank, moldy-smelling carpets were our welcome and were comforting. Those sights and smells meant home to me.

I unlocked the door to my shabby room and waited for the boy to follow me inside then locked it behind him. I was expecting Jasper at some point but that slut had his own key and could let himself in if he wanted. I reached up and pulled the chain to turn on the single light in the room and then turned to look at him, my unplanned for and uninvited guest.

He was standing only a few feet from me, his hands deep in the pockets of his dirty jeans and his dark head down. His hair was about shoulder length and cut in several long layers that hung around his face, framing it with their wavy length. His shoulders were very broad and I could see, even through the clothes he wore, that his build was quite impressive. He was a couple inches shorter than me though and height was always an advantage in a tussle. I was stout enough and I was certain I could overpower him if the need arose.

"You hungry?" I asked.

He nodded his head but didn't look up. I walked over to the frig and opened it, poking around among the week old Chinese takeout and molded food until I found what I was looking for. I laid out a package of bologna and some cheese, then got the bread out of a cabinet above the frig. I put it down beside the bologna and cheese and gestured to it.

"Help yourself. It's all I got right now," I said.

He practically tore across the room and grabbed the bread, ignoring the cockroaches that ran across the table as he made himself a sandwich. I reached back into the dirty frig and got a can of Coke which I tossed to him, then I walked over and sat down on the sagging pull out couch to study him as he ate in silence.

He was beautiful to me and that was without a doubt. I began to formulate a plan on how I could use him to make more money. I pimped about 10-12 different boys at a time. Men my age were almost too old to get much business no matter how we looked. I needed younger blood; young, hard bodies like his. Oh, he was perfect for the trick, perfect for the hustle. I just had to convince him of it. He might even have done it before to get by, who knew.

"Listen," I said as he finished eating. "You want to stay here, you got to work. Nobody gets a free ride, you got it?"

He looked across the table at me, his naivety showing on his face. "What do you mean, work?" He asked.

"I mean you turn tricks for me, that's what. I ain't running no shelter here. You wanna stay here and eat my food, you gotta suck some cock and take it up the ass. My clients want fuck-hot boys and let me tell you, they will want you," I answered.

"I'm not a prostitute," he said, picking up the can of pop and taking a sip of it.

"You think I'm feeding you for free?" I asked. "I don't give two shits about you, Jacob. I don't give a rat's ass if you freeze your dick off out there. You ain't nothing to me but another homeless kid on the street. I'm out for one person and that person is me. I'm a pimp. I'll find work for you but you got to turn tricks or you're going to find yourself right back out on the fucking street again."

He sat looking at me. I could see him weighing my words in his mind. He glanced up at the big window, the snow hitting hard against the glass and blowing in around the cracks in the lower panes. It was nasty outside. If he went back out into it he would freeze. He swallowed hard and stared at the floor.

"So, you goanna work for me or what?" I asked.

"I've never done nothing like that before," he said so quietly I almost didn't hear it.

"So? Do you think the John's care if you've ever sucked cock before? They will go nuts over a sweet, young virgin like you. They'll pay me good for your ass and that means you make a good wage too. I take 30% of all my tricks pay, you get the rest. That ain't a bad deal if you think about it, Jacob," I said as I struck a match and cupped my hands around the fragile flame to light my Marlboro.

"I don't want to do that stuff. I'm just a kid…" he protested.

"Then the parties over, get the fuck out!" I sang.

"Where am I supposed to go?" he asked, those hard, black eyes trained directly on me. Did he think I would give him any sympathy?

"Listen, I don't give a shit! Get the ticket, punk! You can go freeze for all I care, you ain't nothing to me!" I shouted, standing up and advancing toward him.

"Please don't throw me out!" he begged, those big, deep-set eyes filling with tears. "I'll freeze out there and I got no place to go. Please…"

I stood over him, knowing I had him in my power now. He would stay; he would do as I said. "Quit your fucking bawling! I don't want to wipe no baby's ass. I ain't got time for it."

I turned away from him and tossed the cushions off the couch, pulling it out into the bed. I sat down on the side of it and pulled off my boots, tossing them across the room. He sat watching as I undressed down to my boxer briefs and reached for the T.V. remote. I turned on the weather channel to see what it would be like tomorrow.

"You can sleep here tonight. You'll have to sleep in this fold-out with me and you better not fucking snore or I'll toss your ass out, got it?" I asked.

He nodded, wiping at his eyes with the sleeve of his jacket. "Do you have a bathroom?" he asked.

"Across the hall but don't sit down on the seat or you'll get herpes or something," I warned.

I watched him take the chain off the door and open it. He left the door cracked and I could see the light come on across the hall. I got up and pulled the chain to turn off the overhead light, leaving the only illumination in the room, the T.V. screen. A moment later he came back and closed the door.

"Put the fucking chain back on the door," I warned and he was quick to comply. I lay there watching him undress. He took off his tattered shoes and filthy socks, then his jean jacket. I watched him cross the room and he climbed into the pull-out beside me and curled up on his side facing away from me.

"What's a matter? Afraid to strip off? Think I'll rape you while you're sleeping?" I asked.

"No, I'm cold, that's all," he answered.

"Suit yourself," I said as I flipped through the channels trying to find something stimulating to watch. Nothing on as usual so I turned to the evening news. Arson in Terre Haute, murder in Evansville, girl raped at Indiana University, the usual shit. After about 10 minutes of that crap I was done for the night. I snuffed out my cigarette and took a sip of bud, then turned over on my side facing away from him.

I wanted to sleep but he was a potent distractant to me. Normally I would have left the kid on the front steps. I wasn't sure why the hell I invited him in an fed him. I was keeping this one, though, if I could. He was a good hook and I knew it. Break him of that vulnerability, that innocence, that fear, make him do my bidding, that was the game and the game was intense.

No matter, I was the champion of breaking bad. I could break him; make him dependent on me just like all the others, Jasper, Paul, Jared, Seth. They meant nothing to me and he meant nothing to me. The world was a cold, hard, ugly place and if you wanted to survive it, you had to be a rock, and island and I was a rock. I was an island. Fuck the rest of it!


	2. Chapter 2

Rent Boyz

Chapter Two

"I mean really, what the fuck?" I shouted as I was awakened at nearly 3:00am by Jasper yanking on the door.

"Take the damn chain off you faggot!" he yelled.

I stumbled over to the door, slammed it shut and yanked the chain off. Jasper came sauntering in and locked the door behind him, sliding the chain back into place. He turned and glanced at me, his cherubic face illuminated by the pale, blue light from the television screen.

"So, taking in strays?" he asked, gesturing toward Jacob, who was sleeping soundly on the pull-out.

"No, he's going to turn tricks for me," I replied as I sat down beside him and lit a cigarette. "Is it any of your damn concern?" I asked, blowing the smoke in Jasper's direction.

"I don't give a shit, just rather not have my stuff stolen," he answered.

"What stuff?" I asked incredulously. "You ain't got anything worth stealing anyway and nothing that would fit him. He's built like a brick, shit-house."

"Yeah, I noticed. Does he have any experience? He looks kind of young," Jasper said.

"No, he ain't never sold his ass before but so what? He'll learn fast enough. All you got to do is shut up and put out. Anybody can do that…"

"Now wait a minute! How old is he anyway?" Jasper asked.

"Why, Jasper, you getting a conscious now or something?"

"No, I just…"

"You just what?" I asked. "Do you think I give a fuck about this kid? I'm looking out for me and me only, you know how I roll."

"I'm just saying, we don't want to get busted for pimping some kid."

"What do you mean by this "we" shit? I'm the fucking pimp, not you!" I said, my voice bordering on the loud side.

Jacob, disturbed by our conversation, sat up and rubbed his eyes. He looked around like he was confused, and then noticed me and Jasper staring at him.

"Holy fucking hell, Ed, he's just a damn kid! Look at that face! He looks like he's 15 freaking years old!" Jasper gasped in his usual overly dramatic way.

"Shut the hell up, Jasper! He's 16 and that's plenty old enough. Me and you were around that age when we started in this business. Besides, did you see his body? He's made for it. All he has to do is look coy and flash em that cute grin, maybe show a little skin and they'll be hooked. With a piece of ass like him on my payroll, its goanna be smooth sailing!"

"Yeah, for you, maybe but not for him," Jasper mumbled.

"Jasper, if you don't shut your whiney, cunt mouth, I'll bust it for you! Now go the fuck to sleep!" I yelled, throwing a couch cushion at him.

"Where the hell am I supposed to sleep?" he asked.

"Lie on the couch cushions and sleep on them. I don't give a shit!" I answered.

"He's in my spot!" Jasper protested.

"He got here first, now go the hell to sleep!" I hissed as I sat up and gave him my "don't push it any further" look.

"Fine, fine…" he mumbled as he arranged the three couch cushions into a narrow, make-shift bed on the floor beside the pull-out.

I flopped back down beside Jacob and reached up to pull the boy, who was sitting up, staring at Jasper, back down beside me. I reached down and rubbed my hand over the crotch of his jeans to get a feel of the size of his junk. When he gasped in surprise and tried to push my hand away, it fueled my volatile temper that was already in the red thanks to that dumb, cunt Jasper and his shit.

I sat back up and leaned over Jacob. He was lying on his back, staring up at me with those dark eyes. He looked petrified. Good, that was exactly how he needed to look. I drew back and brought my open palm down directly on the side of his face, then rolled on top of him, driving my knees between his thighs. I took his arms and pinned him down to the mattress. He began to struggle like a wild thing and I shouted for Jasper to help me.

"Get his fucking arms, Jaz!" I yelled. Jasper moved to obey my shouted order, taking Jacob's arms and pinning them above his head.

I knelt over his thighs and drew back, punching Jacob directly in the mouth, splitting his lower lip. "Listen you little boy-bitch! I told you that you have to turn tricks if you're staying here! Did you think I was bluffing? One more thing, if I wanna touch you, I'm going to do it and you'll like it!"

He lay there, struggling and staring up at me. He didn't say a word. I could tell by the way he gradually calmed himself down and became very still beneath us, that he was used to being hit and abused. He'd told me that he had never done anything sexual with another guy but that didn't mean he hadn't ever had the shit beat out of him. I could tell that he had. He became almost resigned to what was happening to him. Resigned, that was, until I moved off of him and reached for the snap on his jeans. When I tried to take them off of him, he went wild again.

"Don't!" he cried, thrashing around so much that I had to get back on him and help Jasper hold him down. I hit him again, this time in the stomach to knock his wind out of him. The distraction was enough to give me time to grab my handcuffs from under the fold-out. I tossed them to Jasper and he and I managed, with much difficulty, to roll Jacob onto his stomach, and then get his hands cuffed together behind his back.

"Fucking hell, this kid is strong!" Jasper shouted.

"Well no shit, Sherlock!" I yelled back.

Both of us were breathless by the time we got him under control. I cut his t-shirt off of him and tossed it aside, and then Jasper helped me get his jeans off. He wasn't wearing any underwear, probably didn't have any. Jasper had located some stout rope that I kept under the kitchen sink for emergencies like this one. We rolled him back onto his stomach and used it to tie his legs to the underside of the pull out. He was helpless and he knew it. I stood beside the bed looking down at my victim.

"You're fucked, boy!" I cruelly teased.

He wouldn't look at me, he refused to meet my eyes but to his credit, he didn't beg or plead. I stripped off my boxer briefs and reached for the bottle of baby oil that Jasper handed me. "Get away, Jasper," I said. He shrugged and walked over to the kitchen table, brushed the cockroaches off the chair and sat down to watch the television.

"Ed, don't hurt him…" Jasper began as he flipped through the channels.

"Piss off, Jasper!" I yelled as I climbed onto the pull out and knelt between Jacob's legs.

"Please don't rape me," he whispered. He'd said it so quietly that Jasper didn't even hear him.

"You need to learn your new trade, boy and there is no time like the present. Besides, wouldn't you rather get your education from me than from some random stranger in a nasty hotel room?" I asked.

"Umm, not to state the obvious but you kind of are a stranger and this is a nasty hotel room, Edward," Jasper quipped.

"Go to hell, Jasper!" I shouted, throwing my lighter at him. He ducked and continued flipping through the channels.

I turned my attention back to my prey. "Jacob, did you honestly think I would just let you mooch off me?" I questioned him.

He didn't say anything so I took that as a sign that he was giving up. I moved myself into position between his legs and began to stroke my hardening cock. It wasn't that I was gay, far from it actually. It was the chase, the struggle, the forced surrender, it drove me wild. I needed to be the winner in that fight in order to get off and tonight, I'd not exactly fought fairly had I? As I knelt there over the top of my helpless sacrificial lamb, I felt a kind of guilt. How could I enjoy this if he hadn't really submitted? I could feel my arousal waning and though I tried hard to keep it, I knew I wouldn't be able to perform under those circumstances. I wanted to fight him and I wanted to do it without Jasper's help. Just as I was preparing to climb off of him, he spoke.

"I'll kill myself if you do it," he whispered.

I leaned down and put my mouth close to his ear. "Do you think I care?" I asked.

"It doesn't matter if you care," he answered. "I'll do it and then all this shit will be over."

"All what shit?" I asked. "You are alive, you got a full belly, and you are warm. So what if you have to put out? What's so damn bad about that? You might even like it you fucking puke! Fuck it!" I yelled as I rolled off him and reached for my boxers.

"Untie this bitch, Jasper. I ain't in the mood to fuck him anymore. Probably get some fucking disease or something," I mumbled as I slipped my boxers on and reached for my smoldering cigarette.

Jasper warily released Jacob from his bonds and then stood back as if expecting to be hit. Jacob made a move for his jeans but I grabbed them and threw them to Jasper. Jacob sighed and shook his head, then lay back down and turned away from me, pulling the covers up over his head.

"Yeah, that's right bitch! You hide your fucking, chicken-shit face from me. You think this is over, it ain't. I'm getting back in that bed."

I threw a shoe at Jasper and told him to turn off the television. He mumbled under his breath at me but did as I told him. They always did what I told them. He flipped it off and settled down on his make-shift bed. After some time, I heard him snoring. I reached for Jacob, putting my hand on his shoulder and pulling him over on his back. He didn't resist me.

I propped myself up on my elbow and began to run my hand over his chest and abs very slowly. I found the rippling muscles beneath my palm to be a potent turn on. I was trying to build back up again, wanting that feeling of power of dominance. I leaned down and kissed him on the forehead, his cheek, the tip of his nose, still, he didn't resist me. Feeling my usual boldness, I brushed his lips with mine and he turned his head.

"If you have to rape me to feel like you're a man then do it but don't kiss me," he said.

"Why the hell not?" I asked.

"When you kiss someone, it means you love them," he answered.

"Who the fuck told you that shit?" I asked him.

"Nobody told me."

"Well, nobody is stupid," I replied as I dropped my mouth onto his full, soft one and gripped his chin with my hand, forcing him to open to the kiss.

At first I feared he would bit me but he didn't. He just lay there passively, refusing to kiss me back. It infuriated me but I let it slide. Some whore boys were like that when it came to kissing. Most John's didn't mind. I resumed my conquest of his body, sliding my hand further south and feeling the dark curls between his legs as I quested for the source of his power, meaning to subdue it with my skillful hand.

"Please don't do that to me…" he pleaded in a hoarse whisper. "You don't care about me. I don't want my first time to be with someone who doesn't care about me…" his voice broke off and he began to cry.

"Are you telling me you ain't never been with anybody before?" I asked, completely taken off guard.

"I told you that," he answered brokenly.

"You said you hadn't ever been with a guy, you never said…" I began.

"God damn it, people, please go the fuck to sleep!" Jasper yelled.

"Shut up, bitch!" I shouted, and then turned back to Jacob.

"So you'd rather get your cherry popped by some random guy than me?" I asked in a rough whisper as I tried again to make a play for his cock. He grabbed my wrist and held it tight in his strong hand.

"I don't want it to be like that either," he answered.

"Fuck you!" I hissed. "First light and you're outa here!" I grumbled as I turned over and yanked the cover up over me. I felt him move beside me and was startled when he leaned up over me.

"I could kill you in your sleep," he whispered.

"Try it, fucker," I replied as I made myself comfortable.

He eased back down and quieted. I waited for what seemed an eternity until I heard his slow, steady breathing. I moved as carefully as I could and slid my hand back down his torso again, loving that feeling of control. I took his flaccid cock in my hand and began to stroke it. At first, nothing, then as he began to stiffen in my hand, I heard him whimper something in his sleep. At first, I wasn't sure I heard him right, and then I realized what he'd said.

"Please don't do that, daddy, please; I'll be a good boy…"

It took me so off guard, that I let go of him and fell back, feeling the bile rising in my throat. I broke out in a cold sweat and began to tremble. I could hear him saying that over and over but it wasn't his voice I was hearing. It wasn't those exact words. It was my voice, my younger voice, saying those words; saying them to any number of the nameless, faceless men who had moved in and out of my mother's life.

"Please don't… I'll be a good boy… I'll be good…"

I felt the lump rising in my throat and the tears threatening to break. I struggled in silent misery for a moment as I pushed it down, deep down. Feelings were for fools and self-pity was for the weak. I was Edward Fucking Cullen, I wasn't weak and I wasn't a fool.

I rolled away from him again and curled up in a ball. It wasn't giving up, it wasn't giving in, it was just me being too tired, too pissed. Yeah, that was it, that was the answer. I wasn't sad. He wasn't getting to me. Fuck him and his fucked up past. He probably didn't even remember being molested. It just came out in his dreams. I would find a way to use that against him. You can use anything if you have to. I could. He would give it up to me. It was going to happen or I would kill him.


	3. Chapter 3

Rent Boyz

Chapter Three

I don't really know what I expected that morning. I imagine I just figured he'd be gone when I got up. No such luck. Jasper woke me around 9:00am to bitch about wanting his trick money. I paid the bitch and ordered him to go get some damn food. I paid the rent; he bought the grub, that was our deal. He grumbled about it not being fair but took off in my Honda for groceries.

I fished through the pile of clothes on the floor for my cleanest, dirty shirt and jeans and headed across the hall to wash up in the little sink. There weren't any showers in this dump but if you were really gymnastic, you could get cleaned up in the claustrophobic, little bathroom across the hall with its cracked porcelain skin and filthy toilet.

Jacob was still sleeping. I should have kept my word and tossed him out but it was so cold outside and it was still snowing. I planned on using that against him. Nobody would want to be homeless on a day like this.

As I was coming out of the bathroom, I was met by Paul, one of my older tricks. He had that "I got a problem" look on his face. That usually meant that his problem was about to become mine.

"What's the deal?" I asked as I lit a cigarette.

"Seth's in the hospital," Paul answered, glancing down at the carpet and kicking at a discarded cigarette pack.

"Why?" I asked.

"The John he was with last night beat the fuck out of him."

"Any particular reason?" I wondered aloud.

"He wasn't one of your John's."

"So the little bitch is going behind my back getting business to make some money on the side and when he gets kicked up he wants me to foot the bill?" I asked incredulously.

"No, I don't think anybody is going to foot the bill. The doctor told us that he probably won't survive. He got a really bad head injury…" Paul stammered off and became silent.

I stood there gaping for a moment, and then quickly got my self- composure. "Nothing to me," I mumbled as I stepped past him to go back inside my apartment.

"Ed, please at least go and see him," Paul protested, trying to move between me and my door.

"Why, so I can go look at a kid all beat up with tubes coming out of every orifice? He put himself in this position. I ain't no fucking baby sitter!" I yelled.

"Just come for a minute so the others can see you there. They're all thinking about leaving you anyway. They're sick of how you treat them…"

"Are you sick of it too, Paul?" I asked between my clenched teeth as I moved closer to the big boy, pinning him against the wall.

"No, Ed. I know where my money comes from," Paul answered sheepishly.

"Good, don't forget it. So, those bitches need to be reminded who pays the bills, do they? Fine, I'll come with you but only for a minute. You got your wheels? Jasper has mine," I said as I lit a cigarette and shook out the match, tossing it aside.

"Yeah, I got my truck," he answered as he started back down the hall.

"Go ahead, I'll meet you downstairs," I called after him as I unlocked the apartment and went inside.

I walked over to where Jacob was curled up naked, sleeping soundly and pulled the blanket down so I could look at him. In the harsh, white light coming in through the windows, I noticed some scars scattered over his body. In places they resembled the buckle of a belt. In other spots, he appeared to have been burnt with cigarettes. So, I was right, he was an abused kid. No matter, we all were abused kids. Why else would we be here? We were the ones nobody wanted, the hated ones, the throw away ones.

I almost shook him awake. I almost told him to get the hell out but I didn't. I'd deal with that when I got back, one shit at a time! I pulled my coat on and headed out the door, locking it behind me.

It was almost two hours later when I finally got back to the apartment. I didn't want to think about what I'd been forced to witness at the hospital. Seth didn't even look like Seth. Jared, Paul and Mike were staying with him there. I didn't see Eric or Riley but I supposed they'd been there and gone. What difference did it make if we stayed with him or not? He didn't know we were there. The doctor told us that Seth wouldn't make it through the night. What did I care? I could replace him. In a sense, I already had. Jacob had a better body and he was younger.

I feigned interest in it all but made no effort to come across as sappy or grief-stricken. I wasn't and there was no point in pretending. I couldn't feel emotions. Emotions made you weak. I put in an appearance to satisfy Paul, and then demanded he take me home.

I could hear movement in the apartment and I suspected it was Jasper back from the store. When I unlocked the door, I was shocked and that doesn't happen very often.

Jacob had been busy. The place was spotless and smelled like bleach and cockroach spray. He'd evidently made a trip to the basement and located some cleaning supplies and bug spray in the laundry room down there. He'd washed the windows and blinds and pulled them up to let in more light. The floor wasn't sticky anymore and the kitchen table and chairs were shining. Everywhere I looked, even in the frig, it was clean and smelled good. Let's face it, a flop-house one-room apartment can only be dressed up so much but it actually looked decent. The little shit had even folded up the couch and dressed it up with a blanket. I noticed the pile of dirty laundry washed, folded and sitting in a basket on the floor by the kitchen table and I was simply too stunned to speak at first.

He was standing at the stove, cooking up some bacon and eggs. A plate next to him had buttered toast piled up on it and my mouth began to water. Jasper had obviously made it home with the goods but there was no sign of him now.

"Been busy?" I asked casually as I sat down at the kitchen table?"

He didn't answer but put the plate of food down in front of me and handed me a cup of hot coffee. I shrugged as I took the cup from him and started to eat. "You think I'm goanna let you stay here and be my damn maid or something?" I asked.

"No, I just can't relax in filth, that's all," he answered.

"Who asked you?" I replied.

"You did," he answered quickly.

"Who said you could eat this food? Jasper worked hard to earn the money that bought this. You ain't worked since you rolled in here."

"I've been thinking about that," he replied as he sat down beside me with his own plate and started to eat. "I guess I could learn to do some things as long as I don't have to actually…"

He didn't bother to complete his thought. I knew what he meant. "So, you'd be willing to suck dick and such but no fucking? Is that what you're stammering about?"

"Yeah, I mean, I don't want to do it but I don't have anywhere else to go and it's too cold to be outside. I don't even have a coat and you cut my shirt up last night," he said, looking around the apartment as if he believed a new coat and shirt would magically appear.

"I'll send Jasper over to the Goodwill to get you a coat and shirt. You need some clothes anyway. You can't trick in those dirty things," I gestured to his ripped-up, stained jeans and tattered shoes. "It's coming out of your first pay of course."

"I don't care as long as you let me stay with you," he said.

"Where is that bitch anyway?" I asked.

"Jasper? He said he was going to see somebody named Seth, something about an accident. The phone rang while you were out and he answered it. He was pretty upset. Who's Seth? Is he one of your boys?"

"What business of that is yours?" I asked.

"None, I guess," he answered, blushing.

"Listen, you keep your head down, your mouth shut, you don't talk unless I speak to you and you don't get into my shit! I ain't your pal, neither is Jasper. He isn't goanna save you and neither am I. You can stay here but only if you do exactly what I say! Got it?"

He nodded and scooted a little away from me, turning slightly as he finished eating. When I was done, I slid my chair back and walked over to the window. Despite the fact that the sun was veiled behind the clouds, it was terribly bright outside due to the thick, white snow everywhere. It even made the darkness seem brighter. I wondered if anyone would be wanting services today. I wouldn't have to wonder about that for very long. The rotary phone on the wall began to ring at almost that exact minute.

I sauntered over to answer it while Jacob piled the dished in the sink and began to wash them like a good, little, house bitch. The call was from a dentist that liked my boys. He was a rich fucker who lived out in Avon and worked in Indie. He was a pediatric dentist and since he couldn't act out his fantasies on the teenage boys who came to his office, he called me and acted them out with my tricks. He asked for Seth, or course but I told him Seth didn't work for me anymore. I offered him Jacob and described my newest acquisition to him. The longer I talked, the more interested he became.

When I hung up the phone and turned around, I could see Jacob staring at me. "Looks like I just got you some business, handsome! Come on; we can walk to the Goodwill store from here and I'll front you the money to get some passable clothes for tonight. When we get back you'll have to wash up across the hall and shave. He likes his tricks to look young and since you're 16, that will make this easy. Here, put this on," I said as I tossed him one of my hooded sweatshirts.

He pulled it over his head and put his old, windbreaker jacket on. We headed out and made our way down the stairs and past Charlie Swan. Outside it was cold as fuck and Jacob began to shiver. I figured he'd be ok on the walk to Goodwill. We'd get him a coat there.

The store wasn't crowded, in fact, Jacob and I were the only shoppers there. I asked the old gal behind the counter if they had any socks and underwear and she told me there were a few packs of unopened stuff in the back that she could rummage through. Jacob gave her his size and we headed off down the aisles to pick up a few shirts, some jeans and a new coat. I managed to get out of there with three pairs of jeans, four shirts, two packages of socks and underwear and a gently used coat all for under 100 bucks. Not too bad if you ask me.

I asked the lady if he could use the dressing room to put on his new clothes and she didn't care. When he was dressed, we put his old things in the bag and headed back out into the cold. He was quite thankful for the new things and kept telling me so, despite my order to him to keep quiet. The kid liked to talk or so it seemed. I'd break him of that. Seth had been much the same.

I sent Jacob across the hall to clean up and gave him my razor. I had an extra toothbrush that used to belong to some other kid. I gave it to Jacob and told him he could have it. As I sat waiting for him to get ready, Jasper made an appearance. He bustled in looking rather shaken.

"Did you see Seth?" he gasped. "What was he thinking, going out on his own like that?"

"Don't know, don't care, it's his fault not mine," I answered, taking a drag of my cigarette.

"Shit! Who cleaned up this place?" Jasper gaped, looking around and noticing our neat domicile.

"Little. bitch boy did and he's goanna keep it like this from now on," I answered.

"You made him do housework?" Jasper laughed.

"No, he just did it on his own, said he couldn't relax in filth."

Jasper shook his head and sat down beside me on the couch. "Where is he now?" he asked as he ran his hand up my thigh and began to rub it firmly against the bulge behind my zipper.

"I took him to Goodwill for clothes and he's in the bathroom getting cleaned up tonight. The Tooth Fairy called while you were out and since he can't fuck Seth anymore, I offered him Jake."

Jasper laughed again and leaned over, brushing his lips along my jawline. "While he's out servicing that pedo, maybe you and I can…"

"Get off me, damn it! I ain't your fucking boyfriend, bitch! I told you that. You ain't nothing to me either! You're just one of my tricks!"

"Then why do you let me stay here?" he asked, his pretty green eyes sparkling. "Why do we sleep together?"

"Cause I don't wanna sit and talk to the fucking T.V., that's why!"

"Good to know," Jasper murmured as he resumed rubbing at the crotch of my jeans.

I turned and punched him in the jaw, shoving him away from me. He sat up and rubbed at the spot but didn't say anything. I flipped through the channels, hoping to find something distracting to watch but it was the usual shit.

Jacob knocked on the door and I sent Jasper to unlock it for him. He'd cleaned up pretty good and I had to admit, getting a look at him all spiffed up was rather arousing. His hair was clean, he'd shaved off the scruff and he looked damn good. I'd picked out a black, v-neck t-shirt and a pair of faded jeans for him to wear. His tattered Chuck Taylors would have to do for a couple tricks. He could get himself a new pair when he had some cash of his own. All in all, it didn't really matter. That dentist wasn't after his shoes, he was after his ass and it looked impressive in those snug jeans.

I tossed a can of deodorant at him but didn't give him any cologne. This particular John didn't want his tricks wearing any. He liked the smell of clean skin better than anything. Suppose it fed into his fantasy about teenage boys. Jacob would definitely fulfill that fantasy for him as long as the kid didn't go back on his word. He'd certainly changed his mind quickly enough.

"Jasper, give me the keys, I need to take Jake to his appointment," I said.

Jasper stood up and rummaged through his pockets for the keys to the Honda and tossed them to me. "Have fun," he called teasingly at Jacob.

"Ignore that bitch," I said as I pushed him out the door ahead of me.

"So, what does he want me to do…?" Jacob started.

"I thought I told you to keep shut unless I was talking to you?" I yelled as I slapped him hard across the left side of his face. He reached for the spot and lowered his head quickly. "I'll fucking tell you what you're goanna do for him when we get there now keep quiet!"

He did keep quiet as we rode across town to where the tall buildings blocked out the natural light. I parked in the garage across from the dentist office and crossed the street. The guard at the front desk didn't ask us why we were there. We skirted the janitor mopping the lobby and made our way to the elevators. We were going to the top floor. The dentist had a small apartment above his office and that was where he liked to get his jollies after work.

As we stepped out of the elevator we faced a narrow hallway leading to a single door. I had to admit it felt slightly claustrophobic and I could see that Jacob was a bundle of nerves. He was trembling and biting his bottom lip.

"Settle down, Jake, he's a dentist and he works with kids all day. He ain't goanna hurt you. He likes innocent-looking, young boys. He'll love you, might even tip you if you do a good enough job. Now just keep quiet and keep your head down. Do whatever he tells you to do. And don't let me hear you saying "I don't want to do that" or I swear I'll beat you to death right here and leave your body for the janitor! Listen, it ain't that bad, you just need to relax when he starts to do it to you. Take some deep breaths and go as limp as you can. Don't fight it or it will hurt like hell. Got it?"

Jacob took a deep breath and swallowed hard, then nodded. I knocked on the door and it opened almost immediately. The Tooth Fairy ushered us inside and shut the door, locking it behind us. Of course, the apartment was nice and opulent. Jake was staring around him like he was in a fucking palace or something. I was used to it. I glanced over at the dentist and he was obviously taken with Jacob, just as I'd known he would be.

"Wow, Ed, where did you find this one?" he gushed.

"Picked him out of a damn dumpster outside my apartment, what's it to ya?" I asked as I lit a cigarette.

"So, does he have any experience?" he asked.

"None whatsoever, so bear that in mind when you use him. I don't want him damaged. He's taking Seth's place on my payroll."

"No problem," he answered as he reached out and ran his fingertips down the side of Jacob's face. "How old is he?"

"He's 16," I answered.

I watched the pervy dentist's face break out in a wide grin at that statement. Part of me wanted to break his perfect teeth for him. I secretly hated men like him, users of boys. He was everything that I despised and yet I had to pretend that it didn't matter to me because it was from men like him that I made my money.

He held his hand out to Jake and Jake glanced up at me, fearfully. "Go with him and do what he tells you to do," I ordered firmly.

Jacob lowered his head and reached out, taking the man's hand and allowing himself to be led to the bedroom. I took a seat on the sofa and tried to pay attention to the television and not think about what was happening in the other room. His dad did that shit to him when he was younger; he ought to know how it went. Maybe he didn't remember but it didn't matter.

I smoked and concentrated on the T.V. Don't think about Seth in the hospital; don't think about Jacob losing his innocence all over again in the other room. Not my problems, not my doing, we all make our own destiny and that was all this was. I was jerked out of my thoughts when I heard what sounded like a struggle coming from the other room. I got up and sprinted across the room. Jacob was probably freaking out and he might be trying to fight the dentist. The bedroom door was locked but I could easily force it and I did so, throwing my shoulder against it and banging it open against the wall as I nearly fell through.

Jacob was on his knees on the floor, naked and struggling. The dentist stood over him. He'd wrapped a belt around Jake's neck and was cutting off his air as he shoved his dick roughly into Jake's mouth. Jake's hands were tied behind his back and he was turning blue and gagging around the hard cock in his mouth and the belt around his neck.

"What the fuck are you doing?" I shouted as I grabbed the belt. I quickly loosened it and shoved Jake backward onto the carpet. I swung hard, punching the prick directly in his perfect mouth and splitting his lips. "You trying to fucking hurt my property?" I stood over him, my fists clenched and fuming. Who the hell did this rich cunt think he was doing that to my trick?

"I just wanted it rough…" he stammered.

"You want it like that; you get it from one of the older guys who like that shit, like Paul. You don't do that to one of my young boys. Did you do that shit with Seth too?" I shouted.

"No, I swear it, I just wanted him like that, he's so muscular, I was afraid he'd fight me," he yelled.

"He sure as hell wouldn't have fought you! I told him to do what you said. You fucking bastard! I ought to take you off my list for that shit!" I shouted.

"No, don't do that, please," he begged.

"We're done for tonight! Pay me for the blowjob he gave you and don't call me again unless you got your shit together. You aren't goanna do my employees like that!"

He got up and rummaged through his pants for some bills and handed them to me with shaking hands. I counted them and shoved them into my coat pocket, then reached down and grabbed Jake by his arm, dragging him across the carpet toward the door. I stopped to gather up his clothes and shoes. I stood watching the dentist with a glacial expression on my face as Jake got dressed, then we got the fuck out of there. When we were in the elevator, I turned to him and couldn't help myself. I backhanded him across the face and stood shaking and fighting the urge to simply beat him to death.

He didn't raise his head to even protest. He just leaned back against the wall of the elevator and cried silently. I jerked him out the doors and across the lobby. The guard at the desk glanced up but didn't say anything. I didn't speak to Jacob on the way back to the apartment. He leaned against the passenger side window and cried silently. I prayed that Jasper wouldn't be home and I decided that if he was, I'd throw him out, send him over to Paul's for the night.

Thankfully, he was gone when I unlocked the door. I shoved Jacob inside and pulled the chain. He stood a few paces from me, staring at the floor. He didn't even ask me why I was so angry. He knew I didn't need a reason. I began to ask myself why I was. I realized it was the thought of that man, that pervert, putting his hands on Jacob that had me so worked up. I'd been sitting there waiting for an excuse to bust open that door and he'd given it to me. I didn't want him touching Jacob and that was what had me so angry, that I felt that way. What did I care, why did I care, that was the reason I was pissed.

"Get those fucking clothes off!" I yelled as I advanced on him and grabbed the coat, yanking it off his shoulders.

I practically tore the t-shirt from him as he struggled to comply while I kept getting my hands in his way. I finally broke off from him and began to undress myself, my hands shaking so hard that I could barely manage it. I couldn't understand this rage, this overwhelming need for him, it was consuming me and I couldn't stop myself and I couldn't control it.

I got up and threw the couch cushions about as I pulled out the bed and threw the blankets off it. I turned and grabbed him by the arms, pulling him down onto it and rolling my body onto his. He didn't fight me. He didn't even try to resist. I rose up, propping myself up on my forearms to look down at him. I could still see the faint marks from the belt around his neck and it enraged me. I couldn't' punish the dentist anymore but I could punish him. He didn't deserve any punishment but I couldn't' help it. I dropped onto him, crushing his soft, pliant mouth with my hard, forceful kiss. I tasted his blood in my mouth and hated it but I didn't' stop. I began to grind my erection against him, not caring if he was hard or not.

When I came up for air I looked down at him again and rolled to one side so I could breathe. He was staring back at me, his big, dark eyes wide and seemingly surprised. I reached up and brushed his hair away from his face and ran my fingers down it just like that bastard had done… him, touching Jacob, my Jacob.

"Did he hurt you?" I asked.

"No," he answered in a broken whisper.

"Good, I don't want my inventory damaged," I answered as I rolled onto him again and took his mouth hard once more.

I wasn't surprised that he didn't kiss me back. It wasn't important. I sat up and looked down over his perfect body with its faint, fading scars and felt a kind of strange feeling stealing over me. I didn't like it. It was emotional and I hated emotional feelings. I struggled against that lump that was trying to rise in my throat. I fought those feelings of endearment that wanted to ingratiate themselves in my heart. He was just a trick, just a moneymaker.

I pushed his thighs apart and hovered over him a moment before I did what surprised even me and went down on him. I couldn't' fathom why in the hell I would even want to do something like that. I didn't do that for the fun of it. I just had this all-encompassing need to be the first to claim him like that. I couldn't fight it. As I began to suck on him as though my life depended on it, I felt his hands tangle in my hair and it made me want to do it all the more. No one touched me like that, so gently, so earnestly.

He began to move, pushing himself up into my mouth. That I wouldn't allow. I pulled off of him and leaned up to look down at that gorgeous face once more. He was flushed and clearly aroused. He looked down at me with an open, honest expression. God, why did I want so to punish him?

I stood up beside the bed and grabbed his shoulder, angling him toward my hard cock. "Suck me," I said through clenched teeth.

He moved closer and looked up at me once more with those big, doe, eyes. I shut my own eyes as he closed that mouth over me and began to work me with a kind of innocent craft. He was obviously not an expert as he kept gagging but he was trying and that was all that mattered. I pushed him down farther, loving the struggle as he tried to take me all the way in. Yes, I needed this, the control, the dominance. This was more like it. I only let him struggle on me like that for a moment. I wanted more.

"Get off me, lay down," I said, roughly shoving him off.

He laid back on the pull out, looking up at me with those same, pleading eyes that seemed to say: "don't hurt me" but that was exactly what I was going to do. I got the bottle of lube from under the couch and began to stroke myself, standing there right in front of him so he could see. He was afraid and it showed on his face and that fear was what fuelled my lust.

I crawled up between his thighs, pushing them apart as I went. "Bend your legs up," I ordered him as I pulled at his knees. He complied and turned his head to the side so he couldn't' see me staring hard at him. "Look at me, you little faggot!" I ordered.

"Please don't make me…" he sobbed.

I slapped him again and moved into position. I pushed two of my lubed fingers roughly into him, surprised at the tightness as I'd not had an unused boy in my bed for longer than I could remember. I conquested for that spot within him that I knew would make him squirm and when I found it, I watched his face go slack and his mouth open as he was helpless to fight that pleasure. Again, it was the dominance, the control I had over him that made me a raging, hormonal mess of a man. My cock was so hard it was almost purple. I couldn't resist claiming him.

I took my fingers out of him and pushed my cock up against that incredible tightness. "Relax…" I whispered as I slid into him and waited for that blissful feeling to take me. He screamed of course and I forced my hand down over his mouth as I began to move. So what if he couldn't relax? That was his problem. I'd told him to. I moved hard, forceful, rough, like I needed it. I didn't care if I hurt him. He screamed once, twice, and then was silent as he gave himself over to the situation. When I felt him relax around me, I knew he was mine. I'd won, I owned him.

I rose up so I could look at his face. He was staring up at me, his eyes filled with tears. I took my hand away from his mouth and covered it with my own, forcing my tongue into his mouth and raping him both ways at once. When he kissed me back I was startled. I'd not expected that but it made the victory all the more potent to me. When he moaned against my mouth and his body began to shudder beneath me, I knew I'd staked my claim. It was all that was needed to throw me over the edge and I gave it up to him, sinking down against that strong, powerful body and dropping into the mindless erotica of my own orgasm.

He was sleeping beside me when Jasper woke me hours later wanting the chain taken off the door. I told him to go to Paul's and threw my keys out the door to him. He protested of course but I shut the door in his face. I needed to be alone with Jake tonight. I went back across the room and stumbled into the bed, laying down and taking him into my arms. I still had to fight the beast within me that wanted to hurt him, punish him for being weak. I had to come to terms with this new feeling I was having, decide if it was good or bad.

He whimpered when I pulled him close, pushing against me with his hands and moaning. "Hush," I said as I rubbed my fingers through his hair. "It's me; it ain't your daddy come to hurt you."

I don't know why I said it. I didn't care about what he'd been through or who else might have hurt him. It didn't matter to me. Or did it…


	4. Chapter 4

Rent Boyz

Chapter Four

I couldn't understand why he stayed with me. I woke up late the next morning and he was still there, sleeping, curled up beside me on the pull out. If I was him, I would have robbed me blind and took the hell off. Maybe he was a pain slut. Some boys were like that. I sure as hell wasn't. I shoved the blankets off and stood up stretching, then went across the hall to splash water on my face and take a piss. When I got back to my room, the phone was ringing off the hook.

"Somebody better be dead!" I yelled as I picked it up.

"Somebody is dead, Edward. It's Seth, he just passed," Paul said, his voice heavy with emotion.

"Shit," I mumbled. "Man, get everybody the hell out of there before they start asking who's going to pay for his bill," I said.

"Don't you care that he's dead?" Paul cried.

"I told you all that I don't give a shit and that's what I meant! I ain't holding nobody's hand in this business! He made a stupid, fucking mistake and it cost him his life! I hope the other's get it through their dumb-ass heads that this is what happens when you go off on your own…" I heard the phone click and I knew he'd hung up on me. "Well fuck you too!" I shouted as I slammed the receiver back on the hook and flipped the phone off as if it was responsible for all my woes.

"What's wrong?" Jacob asked. He was sitting up on the side of the pull-out with the quilt over his lap.

"Nothing you need to concern yourself about, mind your damn business," I answered as I rummaged through my jeans for my cigarettes and lighter. "Get dressed and make me some fucking breakfast!"

He got up slowly, winching as if in pain and gathered up his scattered clothes from the floor where I'd thrown them last night as I was trying to tear them off of him. I stood watching him get dressed and then flopped down in one of the kitchen chairs to smoke and brood. Fucking Seth going and kicking the bucket like that! What the hell was he thinking? I wasn't responsible for it and I wasn't getting stuck with the guilt either. Didn't matter anyway, I had me an A1 replacement.

I watched Jacob out of the corner of my eye as he mixed up some pancake batter and poured it in a skillet. The kid was a decent housekeeper and one hell of a cook. He had his uses. I had been trying not to think about last night and how I'd been forced to rescue him from the Tooth Fairy. I still didn't understand my actions. I normally wouldn't even have stayed with a trick but something made me want to be near him, want to look out for him. I shook my head and exhaled. Fuck it! I kept my wall up for times just like this. He wasn't getting through it. As I was brooding on it all, I realized he'd spoken to me.

"What?" I asked with exasperation.

"How many do you want?"

"How many what?" I yelled.

"Pancakes, how many do you want?"

"Three, God damn it! Fuck, Jacob, you talk too much!"

"Sorry," he said as he turned back to the stove.

I got up and poured myself a cup of coffee from the pot he'd started before making the pancakes. I hesitated a minute, then got him a glass of milk and sat it down in front of his chair. I was slightly astonished at my own actions. I never waited on anyone and I sure as hell didn't do things out of a desire to be nice. Well shit, he needed the milk to stay in shape. Yeah, that was it, that was the reason I did it.

He put a plate in front of me and got one for himself, then sat down beside me and stared at the glass of milk, like he was afraid it was poisoned or something. I ignored him and dug into my breakfast. I hoped Jasper would stay the hell away today. I wasn't in the mood to get any shit from anybody about Seth and Jasper was just the type of bitch to try and make me feel sorry about it. I watched Jacob eating in silence. He was a bit subdued this morning and I wondered if it was because of what I'd done to him last night.

"Not that I care or anything but what's the deal with you and your old man? He fuck you up or something?" I asked casually.

Jacob stopped eating and put his fork down. He didn't look at me but I noticed him staring at the table like he was seeing something else there. He swallowed hard and then dropped his head.

"You goanna answer me or what?" I pushed.

"I don't wanna talk about that," he said, his voice so quiet I had to strain to hear him.

"I don't give a shit what you want! I asked you a question now answer me," I retorted loudly.

"You can't make me tell you," he mumbled.

"The hell I can't…" I started yelling and then stopped abruptly. "To fuck with it! I don't give a rat's ass about you anyway! Besides, it's fucking obvious that he beat the hell out of you; probably screwed you to, didn't he?"

"Shut up!" he cried, putting his hands over his ears and turning his chair away from me.

It was so on now. I could feel his fear and his misery and I fed on it. I stood up over him and grabbed the back of his chair, pulling him around to face me again. "He fucked you didn't he? Came into your room at night when you were supposed to be sleeping, booze on his breath, hands all over you, touching you, forcing you to touch him. I bet he made you suck him didn't he? I bet he raped you in your little, virgin ass didn't he?"

Before I knew what was happening, Jacob leapt up out of the chair and punched me directly in the mouth. I staggered backward and tripped over one of the discarded couch cushions. I landed on my ass on the hardwood. He was standing over me, wringing his hands, his face set in a furious scowl. Tears were running down his cheeks and he was breathing hard through clenched teeth. I would almost have been afraid of him, if not for the switchblade knife I carried at all times. It was in the front pocket of my jeans that lay on the floor, less than a foot away from me. If he tried anything, I felt fairly confident I could make a grab for it and defend myself.

"I hate you!" he cried.

"You think I fucking care?" I asked.

"I wish you were dead!" he answered.

"Kill me then, if you think you can!" I sneered contemptuously.

"I could, you know. I've done it before."

"You ain't never done it before. You ain't never off'd nobody!" I shouted.

"Oh yes I have," he spat back at me.

"Who'd you kill?" I asked. "Some dog you accidently ran over with your tricycle?"

"I killed my father."

"You're a liar!" I shouted but I wasn't entirely sure that was true. I scooted back away from him and bumped into the pull out. I reached up and lifted myself into a sitting position on the side of it and snagged my jeans with my left foot. I drug them over to me and began to slip them slowly on, never taking my eyes off him. He didn't move. When I stood up to snap and zip them, he took a step back.

"I choked him to death in his sleep one night and then I stole all the money in the house and the keys to his truck. I drove till I didn't have any more gas money then I pushed the truck into a river and hitch-hiked here. I killed him and I'll kill you too if you ever touch me again you fucking rapist!"

"You're making that up. You ain't got the sack to kill nobody! You let me hit you and fuck you up and you never even tried to defend yourself till now. Why would you put up with it, if you're such a big, bad-ass murderer?" I asked, advancing a step toward him just to see if I could get him to back up. He didn't.

"I didn't want to kill him. He just wouldn't stop hurting me. I couldn't help it. I just… I just… I put my belt around his neck and I just…" He stammered off and went silent, then dropped to his knees on the floor and covered his face with his hands.

I stood in front of him and tried to come up with a really cutting remark but I was without words and that wasn't something that happened to me very often. I waited for the tongue tied-ness to pass but it didn't and I was crestfallen. I wanted to be cruel but I couldn't summon anything hurtful to say. I knelt down beside him on the floor and tried to pull his hands away from his face but he wouldn't let me. I shoved at his chest and sat back on the floor.

"Quit bawling like a fucking baby. If you really did kill him then he's dead and gone and it serves that incestuous pedo right! Any man that'd do that to his own kid deserves to die. You done him right, so quit feeling sorry for yourself. If you hadn't sent him to hell he'd still be hurting you so get over it!"

He sniffed and took his hands down but he wouldn't look at me. I got up and retrieved my cigarette off the floor where it had landed when he cocked me in the face. I shoved it back into the corner of my mouth and stomped over to him again, smacking him across the back of his head.

"That's for hitting me in the mouth you bastard!" I shouted.

He got up and stood staring at the floor. I ignored him and took a t-shirt out of the clothes basket, stepping around him and reaching for my coat that was draped over the back of a chair. I needed some fresh air and I wanted to get the hell away from him for a minute. I supposed I would go try to find Jasper and get that pity party over with. As I headed out the door, I couldn't resist one last quip at him. I turned to look back and he was still standing there in that same spot, staring at the floor as if he could bore holes in it with his dark eyes.

"Clean this place up and get a shower. You look like you just got raped or something," I said as I slammed the door.

I almost ran down the stairs, so eager was I to get away from the misery I'd left behind me. I wasn't really ready to accept the story he'd just told me. I didn't think he actually had the brass to choke somebody to death but I'd been there myself and I'd felt like doing it more times than I could remember.

How many nights had I stood over the top of one of the pricks my mom had dragged home and into our pitiful lives? How many times had I held a pair of scissors or a kitchen knife over those sleeping forms? I'd so wanted to do what he claimed he'd done. I never did, though. If he actually was a murderer, that gave me some leverage over him. I could use it. I could threaten to call the police, to turn him in. Oh this might come in handy!

"Hey, Charlie!" I called, tossing a few bills toward him as I pushed the door open. He didn't answer me. He never answered me. It was as though he didn't even see me, didn't even know I was there. Normally something like that would have pissed me off but I chose to ignore it. I had respect for Charlie and I let him get away with ignoring me.

I crossed the street in the biting wind and located the closest pay phone. I dropped a dime and dialed Paul's number. A voice came on the line to inform me that the number had been disconnected. I cursed and hung up the phone, shoving my hands into the pockets of my coat. I glanced up at the window of my apartment. He was up there, Jacob, the self-proclaimed murderer. I sighed and turned back, crossing the street and walking up the steps. I noticed that the money I'd tossed to Charlie was gone. He might not speak to me but he could sure as hell take my money.

I found that I was a little hesitant to open the door to the apartment but I scolded myself for being such a coward and unlocked it, throwing it open and sauntering inside like I was king of the fucking world.

He was sitting on the side of the pull-out looking sorrowful. I took my coat off and kicked off my shoes, then went over to him. I was seized, unexpectedly, with another one of those strange feelings when he looked up at me. He had the most melancholy eyes.

"Did you really kill your father?" I asked and he nodded his head.

I knelt in front of him and wiped the tears away from his eyes with my thumbs as I gripped his face in my hands. He didn't try to pull away from me and simply closed his eyes so he wouldn't have to face my intense stare.

"Quit trying to hide from me! You did it, it's done, now let it go! Why are you still letting that son of a bitch hurt you? He's mold in the ground! You didn't do anything wrong, Jacob. He was the bad guy, not you! I let people hurt me for years then I learned to be tough. I learned to be cruel. There are two types of people in the fucking world, boy, the ones who use and the ones who get used. You got to decide which one of them people you're goanna be," I said, not sure why I felt the need to give him a pep talk.

"Why do you care? You keep telling me you don't give a shit about me so what difference does it make to you?" he asked.

"It don't make me two shits of a difference! I'm just saying it so I don't have to listen to you crying like little girl anymore. You either buck up or fuck off. That's how it is. It's rough and it's cold but it's life and you either live or die. It's no skin off my sack."

When I made a move to stand up, he reached out and closed his hands over my wrists, holding me in place. I paused and looked down into those dark eyes. He was quite intense looking, really.

"Why did you do it?" he asked.

"Do what?"

"What you did to me last night, why?"

"Cause I wanted to, that's why," I answered, trying again to stand up but he held tightly to my wrists.

"Don't you care about me at all?" he asked, pleadingly.

I hesitated a moment. I could have told him that I did. I might have said that there was a glimmer of feeling in my cold, dead heart for him. I ought to have thrown myself at him and pushed him back against the mattress, kissed him, loved him right but I didn't. I yanked my hands away from him and shoved him back.

"I told you I don't give a damn about you, Jacob. You ain't nothing but a little, fraidy boy that waited for his abusive daddy to pass out drunk before he killed him, then ran away like the chicken shit he is. I fucked you cause I was horny and that's the only reason. I sure as shit don't love you. I don't love nobody and I don't need nobody. You don't need nobody either. You need to learn to stand on your own! I ain't wiping your ass for you."

He shook his head sadly and looked down at his hands folded in his lap. Outside, the snow blew against the glass and the cold seeped in through the cracks in the windows. The single light bulb swung on its rusty chain over my head, blown about by the drafts of cool air. I stood there in front of him shaking and confused by my conflicted feelings. He continued to remain motionless and the clock ticking behind me on the wall was the only sound. It made me uncomfortable. It was alien and out of place. Time had no meaning for me. Time was nothing but a face on the water.

"Damn you! Who the hell do you think you are coming into my life like you did? I didn't want this! I don't need this shit!" I cried as I turned away from him, from his passive-aggressive resistance. I was trembling so hard I felt as if I would pass out. I couldn't draw air into my lungs fast enough and the lump in my throat was threatening to strangle me. I heard him moving behind me and when I turned around, he was right there, directly in front of me and he reached out, putting his big, strong arms around me. He pulled me close to him and held me tightly. I began to struggle like a caged animal but he wouldn't let me go.

"Damn you!" I shouted again but it lacked conviction and he knew it.

"Why can't you just say it?" he asked. "Why won't you just let me in?

"I don't want you!" I yelled.

"I think you do," he whispered.

And so we stood there, me in his arms, not minding being in his arms; him holding me and me not able to break free. I didn't even want to try.

"Damn you," I said defeated.

"I'm already damned, Edward and so are you," he answered.

Didn't I know it? Didn't I know it so well? The clock continued to tick in that slow, hateful rhythm as he began to stroke his fingers through my hair. I tilted my head back to look at him again and I saw something in his eyes. It was akin to understanding. He was more like me than I'd ever known. He was stronger because he could show his emotions. I kept mine locked deep inside because they frightened me.

When he slid his tongue into my mouth, I didn't fight him. As his arms pulled me back toward the bed, I didn't struggle. I was not scared of him. This wasn't a trick. This wasn't some quick explosion of forced pleasure for money in the back of a car or some seedy alley. He wasn't a boy for hire, I wasn't a pimp. I was Edward and he was Jacob and this was powerful. I loathed and loved him in that moment and when I found myself lying naked beneath him, I didn't push him away. I reached for him and pulled him down onto me.

When he entered me, it wasn't hurt, it wasn't for money. As he moved within me, he was giving himself to me and I was giving myself to him. I looked up at him, poised above me and gasped for breath. I'd never felt anything like it before; that feeling of being taken and wanting to be taken. I clutched at him, longing for it and needing it and he leaned down and kissed me so gently, sweetly that I thought my heart would rend from it.

When I came for him, I was crying. Tears ran down my face and I tasted them when he kissed me again, the salt of them. It burned in my mouth as I realized what they meant, what they signified. I tried to shove him off me but he wasn't having it. He held me and forced me to stay right there, in that moment with him. He made me keep my heart open and I was helpless to prevent it from happening.

The wind rattled the window panes and the clock continued to tick. The only other sound was his soft breathing and the feel of it against my neck as he lay on me. I held him and brushed my fingers through his hair.

"My God, what's happening to me?" I asked aloud but there was no answer.


	5. Chapter 5

Rent Boyz

Chapter Five

I stood in front of the cracked mirror in the dimly lit bathroom across the hall from my room. I stared at my reflection and wondered who the hell it was that looked back at me. Always I had worked so hard to maintain solid control and be emotionless. Feeling, loving, letting go, those things did nothing but open you up, make you vulnerable, allow you to be hurt. I was over being hurt. I was done with pain. So why in the name of God had I allowed him to do what he did to me?

He was awake, dressed and humming some random tune to himself as he tidied up the little room. I'd lain there on the pull out, watching him moving about and felt numb and cross with myself for giving in so easily. I had never done that before in my life. Oh, I'd given myself willingly to men before but it had always been for money, never like what I'd experienced with him. I had wanted it, wanted him to fuck me, love me. I had allowed it with no reservations and now I felt the burn of it.

So looking at myself in that damn mirror only made me angrier. He was over there right now feeling self-assured. Maybe it had been a ploy all along to throw me off guard. Perhaps he had been acting the whole time and wasn't as innocent or vulnerable as he seemed. I knew that was bullshit even as I thought it and it gave me no comfort to realize it.

"I am damned, Edward and so are you."

His prophetic words only served to haunt me this evening and I hated it. Sighing, I threw open the bathroom door and crossed the hall. In the few moments since I'd been gone, Jasper had slunk in and was sitting at the kitchen table glaring openly at Jacob. He looked up at me when I entered and his scowl shifted to me.

"So, replaced me with this mix breed here? Never thought you would be a traitor to your own race, Ed!" he spat at me.

I crossed the space between us in two strides and struck him across the face with my open hand so hard that he fell out of the chair. I was on him in a moment, straddling his hips and punching him as hard as I could. I was barely conscious of Jacob's hands on my biceps, pulling me back and off of Jasper. I was panting like an animal and growling uncontrollably. Jasper sat up and swiped at the blood running from his nose.

"That's it, you bastard! Use your fists! You don't seem to know how to do anything else! Fuck you! I just came over here to get my shit and then I'm gone! I'm staying at Paul's from now on and you can piss off if you think I'm ever gonnna work for you again! None of the other guys are going to either! They are done with your abusive shit!"

He got up and began to rummage through the clothes basket on the floor, throwing the laundry about as he took from it the things that were his. He started to take the groceries out of the cabinets but I shoved past Jacob and grabbed him, pulling him back and shaking my head no. "Those are mine," I yelled.

"What the fuck ever!" Jasper hissed and turned, shoving the last of his personal belongings into a back-pack and slinging it over his shoulder. "I hope you like getting the shit beat out of you, you little, half-breed mother fucker! The only thing he's going to do to you is fuck you up and use you till you ain't worth nothing to anybody anymore then he'll throw you out in the cold to freeze!" he said to Jacob.

Jacob didn't answer and Jasper shook his head and sneered in contempt. "Mother fucking Indian, you son of a bitch, I hope he scalps you!" Jasper said, leaning over and staring directly at me as he walked past me, slamming the door behind him. The light swung on its chain above me, rattled from the force of the door slamming.

"Fuck you!" I shouted at the closed door and shook my head in disgust. I turned toward Jacob. He'd gone back to what he'd been doing before, stacking dishes in the sink and running soapy water over them.

"Don't pay any attention to that bitch, Jacob. He's just jealous because you're hotter than he is and he knows it. He ain't my boyfriend and he never was. He's pissed that you took his spot on the pull out." I lit a cigarette and took a couple drags to steady my nerves, then picked up the phone and dialed the number of one of my more trusted customers.

"Hello?"

"Yeah, Emmett, you up for some business? I got a new trick, wanted to see if you might be interested?"

I went on to describe Jacob to him and of course he was interested. We made a deal for him to come by my place where he could use Jacob or both of us if he chose. Emmett liked to spice things up and it promised to be an interesting evening. I hung up the phone and walked over to the stack of bills sitting on top of the television. Phone bill, cable bill, rent payment, water bill, and the usual stuff. I tallied it all up and came up with the figure we would need to make it possible to continue our lives here in this little piece of hell for another month. We would need about a thousand for bills and probably around three hundred or so for food and gas for the car.

I knew I could get about five hundred out of Emmett. He was a rich boy and had no idea how much he should be paying. I might be able to get more than that from him if I got him drunk first. I glanced over at Jacob but he was ignoring me so I plopped down on the pull out and picked up the remote. Jacob continued his domestic duties and after he was done with the cleaning up, he started dinner. My mouth watered at the smell of food cooking. He was making hamburgers and fried potatoes. Damn but this kid could cook!

We ate in silence and after he'd cleaned up the mess, I stood up and stretched. "I'm going across the hall to clean up. Pick out something to wear and clean up at the kitchen sink. You need to shave too. Emmett is coming over and we are going to tag team him. He likes to do two boys at once. Or rather he will probably want to fuck you while you suck my cock. He gets off on that."

Jacob glanced down at the floor and then back up at me. "You're ok with that?" he asked.

"With what?" I questioned as I took a drag off my cigarette.

"With him fucking me?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" I asked.

"I just… It's just that when that dentist…" he said, looking away from me.

"I don't want to hear any of your shit! We have to trick to make money and since apparently every one of my boys had decided they don't need me anymore, I'm gonna have to start selling ass too. It don't matter. You and me can make plenty of cash just the two of us. We can sell ourselves as a couple ready to please and trust me; John's will be all over that shit! Now don't be scared. Just do like I told you!"

I gathered up my things and headed back across the hall. He was scared and I could see that but we had to do it. There wasn't any other way. I knew Jasper was just bluffing. He and the others would come back to me. They didn't have the connections to find their own work. They'd be cold and hungry soon enough. This wasn't the first time I'd had to deal with panty shit like that from them.

By the time I got back to the room, Jacob was all cleaned up. He'd washed his hair and shaved and taken a bath at the kitchen sink. He sat on the pull out, his hands folded in his lap, resigned to whatever fate I had for him. Emmett knocked on the door and I went to answer it.

"Hey, Cullen! Thought you forgot me," he said, slapping me affectionately on the shoulder. "I got booze," he offered, holding up a six pack and waving it around.

Despite how much I hated rich fuckers, I just couldn't bring myself to hate Emmett. He was too much fun to hang around with even though it meant ending the evening with his big cock being shoved up my ass. I invited him in and took the beer from him, popping a tab for myself and tossing one to Jacob.

"This him?" Emmett asked, cocking a thumb in Jacob's direction.

"Yep, cute ain't he?" I asked as I handed Emmett a beer and put the rest in the frig.

"Fuck yeah he's cute! Bet he's a good cock sucker too, ain't he?"

Jacob was blushing miserably and staring at the floor. I couldn't help but feel a bit proud of myself for finding him the way I did. He was cute and he was a good cock sucker. "Yep, he sure as hell is!" I answered. "Care to find out for yourself? He's not very experienced so…"

"Not very experienced? You mean he's not been doing this very long?" he asked with a huge grin spreading over his face.

"Nope, he was a virgin up until a couple days ago. He's only 16 so you know, not much fucking and he's pretty tight."

"Damn," Emmett growled. "Jesus, Ed, you sure as hell know how to pick em. Does he talk?"

"Yes he talks but don't get him started. He'll never shut up if you do," I warned.

Emmett laughed, good naturedly and kicked off his shoes. "Turn on some music, Ed!" he encouraged.

I shrugged and sauntered over to the radio. I flipped it on and dialed through the stations. I knew Emmett liked hard rock so I searched around for a good station then turned it up loud enough to please him but not disrupt the other tenants.

"Fuck yeah!" he said as he stripped off his shirt and reached for the snap on his jeans.

Jacob was looking hard at me with those bleak eyes of his. I went over and sat down beside him. "It'll be cool, Jake. Emmett is a good guy. He's all fun and party. He won't do anything fucked up like that other dude. Trust me," I said as I laid my hand on his shoulder.

"You really want me to do this?" he asked pitifully.

"Yes, we have to make some money; now don't be a mood killer."

"Hey, Cullen, make him strip for me. I fucking love this song. Make him strip off to it," Emmett called as he struggled out of his jeans.

"Well, sit the hell down and watch, then!" I ordered.

Emmett got himself into one of the kitchen chairs and reached for his beer. I turned up the radio just a bit more and grabbed Jake's arm. "Come on, Jacob. Make it sexy and don't tell me you don't know what to do. Just take it off slow and easy and dance for him."

Jacob looked petrified but he did as I asked and stood in the center of the room. "Turn around, show me your ass!" Emmett encouraged.

I took Jake's shoulders in my hands and turned him to face the radio. "You can do it, Jake. Just imagine you are a body with no soul. You are just a machine and you can do whatever he needs," I said against his ear.

"A body with no soul…" he mimicked me and then turned those dark eyes on my. "Is that what I am?" he asked.

"For now," I answered as I backed away from him.

I sat down beside Emmett and he reached out, taking my shirt in his hands. "Fucking lose these clothes, Cullen. This shit is over the top hot!"

Jacob began to dance, slowly at first, swaying his hips to the smoky beat of the song, then he started to get into it a little more and reached for the band of his t-shirt, pulling is slowly over his head. Emmett hooped and hollered like a farm boy at a rodeo. I swallowed hard, my own cock starting to notice Jacob's little show. I shucked my own clothes to the floor and took a powerful swing of my beer as Jacob's head tilted back and he kicked off his shoes. When he reached for the snap on his jeans, Emmett got overly excited.

"Turn around, handsome. You are fuck hot!" he called.

Jacob glanced over his shoulder at Emmett and then did as he was asked, keeping that dark head down, his expression smoldering. He was really trying to get in the character and I appreciated his effort. Maybe he could do it after all. There was nothing like surrendering your will to someone else's fantasy. It was kind of liberating because it allowed you to become somebody else just for a moment. Jacob was in that headspace now and I could see from the look on his face but it wasn't Emmett he was looking at. It was me. He was doing it all for me.

"Fuck yeah!" Emmett moaned, rubbing at his erection.

Jacob slipped his arms behind his head, intertwining his fingers, elbows out, chest up, head back. His eyes fluttered closed as he got into it more and more, his hips moving around in a seductive circle. "Damn, Jake," I muttered under my breath.

"Oh, yeah, Cullen, he's fuck hot! Get up there with him. Dance with him!" Emmett said and I was on my feet even before he finished making the request.

I moved behind Jacob and grasped the zipper of his jeans, slowly lowering it, and then I began to shove them down an inch at a time. He continued to dance, his head tilting back against my shoulder. I knew my presence so close to him was making it easier for him to do this and I took a kind of perverse pride in that. For him, Emmett didn't even exist in that moment and that was fine with me. I knelt and pulled his jeans the rest of the way down and he lifted his feet, one at a time to step out of them. He'd left his boxers off, knowing, perhaps that there was no need for them.

"God, his cock is fine!" Emmett roared as he shifted his position, widening his legs and stroking his erection shamelessly. Dance with him, Cullen!"

I grasped Jacob's hips and pulled him back against me, swaying with him in time to the music. Then I turned him and we stood sideways of Emmett so he could watch. I wrapped my hands roughly in his hair and tipped his head back as I forced myself into his slightly open mouth, letting Emmett watch our tongue play.

"Christ!" he said in a hoarse voice.

I ignored him as I began to thrust against Jacob, grinding shamelessly into him as he moved in time to the music. I could feel him getting hard against me and I knew he was deep into his own head right now. "Good baby," I whispered against his ear. "Block it all out. Just block it all out."

I led him over to the bed as the song stopped and eased him down onto it, and then motioned for Emmett. He rose and crossed the floor to join us. I took his cock in my hand and gave it a few strokes as he licked his lips and looked down at Jacob. "Got a rubber?" he asked me.

I let him go and went to rummage through my jeans, then tossed him one. He slid it over his cock and stood stroking himself. "Open up boy," he said to Jacob. I found myself bristling a bit but I pushed it down. We had to do this. Block it out, just like I'd told him. Block it out.

Jacob glanced up at me, then swallowed hard and leaned his head forward. I couldn't see from where I was standing so I moved past Emmett and sat down beside Jacob on the bed. I forced myself to remain passive as I watched Emmett fuck Jacob's mouth with his hard cock. I watched it moving in and out, watched Jacob's face, his eyes closed tightly as he tried so hard to stay in that cold, detached place in his mind.

"Enough of that," Emmett said, "I want his ass. I want him to suck you while I do him."

I climbed up onto the foot of the pull out and reached for Jacob, moving him into position on his hands and knees. He didn't look at me and I knew it was for the best. Emmett looked around for a minute as if he was lost. "Got any lube?" he asked aloud.

"I reached under the couch and retrieved it, then tossed it to him, and then I slipped my hand under Jake's chin and forced his head up. "Suck on me, baby," I said, my voice deep and husky.

Emmett watched us for a moment as he lubed up his cock. Jacob was doing a really good job on me and the feel of his mouth pulling on me like that was enough to nearly unman me. Jacob gasped around me when Emmett pushed two fingers into him and I tensed up, my mouth going into a tight line.

"Go easy on him!" I said a bit more harshly than I needed to.

"Sorry," Emmett said, grinning at me.

I looked down over Jacob's back at the big boy poised behind him, his cock in his hand, ready to fuck him, ready to fuck my boy. I swallowed my pride and my sense of possessiveness. Jacob was a trick and so was I, that was all this was.

When Emmett pushed against him, Jacob cried out and my cock slid from his mouth. I grabbed his shoulders and pulled him to me, the side of his face rested against my stomach.

"Damn, you, Emmett! I told you to go easy…" I stammered.

"I'm not trying to hurt him. He's just so fucking tight, ahh, Christ!"

I turned away, unable to watch him impale Jacob. I ran my hands through Jacob's hair and tried to soothe him as best I could. He gasped for breath, his whole body trembling at the painful assault. I wanted to make it stop.

"Make him suck you!" Emmett pleaded. "That's what I'm paying for. Make him do it!"

I sighed and cupped Jacob's chin in my hand. "Do it, baby," I encouraged. "It'll take your mind off of what he's doing to you."

I pushed against his mouth, feeling like a villain and knowing that I was. He opened for me with a gasp that sounded more than half like a sob. I began to thrust against him, trying to find my own headspace, that place I could retreat to in my mind. It was so far away. Emmett picked up his pace and thrust harder, then without any warning, he pulled out and pushed Jacob aside.

"Change places! I want your ass now, Cullen. You can suck him off. I want to watch his face while you make him cum!"

I reluctantly got into position on my hands and knees. Jacob moved like a robot, just like I'd told him and stood up at the foot of the pull out. He took his cock in hand and reached for me, cupping my chin. I looked up at him and watched his eyes darken over when I breathed against him. I opened my mouth for him and swallowed his length as Emmett impaled me from behind. I gasped and Jacob used that moment to thrust into my mouth, gagging me. I lifted one of my hands to push against him but he was immovable. I fought to get back into my head and go where I needed to go but it was simply not possible.

Emmett was close and I knew I just had to endure it for a few minutes more. "Make him cum, Cullen. I want to watch his face while I blow!" Emmett ordered.

I hollowed my cheeks and gave it my best effort, running my tongue along the underside of his cock and flicking the tip as I moved it in and out of my mouth. I ducked down and began to suck and lick at his balls and he lifted his cock up and held it against his stomach for me to make my job easier. I leaned back to watch that visual and the sight of him holding his cock in his hand with that solemn, deep expression was too much for me. I lowered my head and came hard. Emmett, feeling the spasm of my body around his cock lost it too and spilled into me, filling the condom. I reached for Jacob's cock and took it back into my mouth, drawing hard on him and tugging at his balls with my free hand but he wasn't giving it up.

"Let him fuck you now!" Emmett gasped from behind me.

I didn't hesitate for a moment. I turned around to face Emmett and tilted my ass up for him. I felt him slide into me effortlessly, stretched as I was from Emmett. I lowered my face to the sheets so I wouldn't' have to look at Emmett sprawled out there in front of me. Jacob fucked me hard and roughly. I listened to his groans of pleasure and when he finally released, the force of it drove me forward almost up between Emmett's legs.

"Damn, Cullen! That was more than I bargained for. You guys are just too fucking hot together!" Emmett said. "How much do I owe you for this?"

"Since you made Jacob dance and since you wanted him to fuck me, that's extra. What say we make it an even eight hundred?" I asked.

"Fuck, Cullen, that's a lot of dough!" he protested.

"Perhaps you think I'm being unfair?" I asked as the hard, cold persona descended over me again. My reputation preceded me and I knew Emmett was just a bit fearful of pissing me off.

"No, that's fine. I definitely want to do this again, real soon," he conceded as he reached for his jeans and retrieved his wallet.

An hour later, Jacob and I sat in the booth of a nearby all-night diner. We'd gotten cleaned up after Emmett left and I'd suggested going out to eat. He didn't protest. I was drinking a cup of hot coffee and eating a piece of blackberry pie. He was stabbing at a slice of chocolate cake. He'd not said much and I was slightly worried.

"Did he hurt you?" I asked.

"What does it matter?" he asked, looking absently out the window at the blowing snow.

"It matters, ok?" I said angrily.

"Why, because you don't want your property damaged?"

"No, because… because… fuck it!" I stammered off, taking a sip of coffee and burning my tongue.

"It bothered you to watch him doing me, didn't it?" he asked.

I didn't' look up at him but I did shake my head yes. I hated to admit it but it had bothered me and he knew it.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because you belong to me," I answered, still refusing to look up at him.

"You mean I'm one of your trick boys?"

"No, it's not like that… Damn it, Jake!"

"What, Ed?" he asked.

"You know I care about you so be happy with that!" I spat back.

"Happy? Is that what I am supposed to be? I'm nothing, remember? Just a body with no soul!"

He got up and shoved his hands into the pockets of his coat and stomped out of the diner. I paid the check and ran out after him. There was no sign of him in the empty street and so I made my way back to the apartment. Charlie was sitting in his usual spot. "Hey, did you see that boy who's always with me?" I asked. "Did he come home yet?"

Charlie remained as always, silent. "Well, fuck you, Charlie! You can always take my money but you won't ever answer me!" I ran past him up the stairs and fumbled with the lock. I knew he wasn't here. He didn't have a key. I threw open the door and was met with silence, emptiness.

I yanked off my coat and tossed it to the side as I sank down on the pull out, face down and buried my head in the pillows. This was the reason I didn't let anyone in. I was always the one who got hurt. I lay there, feeling sorry for myself as the wind beat against the windows and howled like a banshee against the glass. The clock ticked ominously on and the minutes of my life passed without me even noticing.

I must have dozed off because when I heard the door open I jumped up and clawed the pillows off my head. He was standing there in the dim light from the hallway. I watched as he closed the door behind him and crossed the floor. I could see the soft orange glow of his cigarette as he inhaled and then I followed that glow to the ashtray where it was extinguished. He kicked off his shoes and sat down on the side of the bed.

"Do you love me?" he asked.

I lay sat there in silence, unable to force myself to say the words. Then I lunged at him, slapping his face as hard as I could. He grabbed my hands and threw me down on the mattress, dropping his weight against me. "Answer me!" he demanded.

I tried to bite him and get my knee up into his groin. It caught him off guard enough to allow me to throw him off. We fell to the floor and I rained down a barrage of punches on him, his back, shoulders, face, and head, whatever I could reach.

"Answer me!" he demanded again from beneath me. "Do you love me?"

"Yes, damn it!" I screamed in despair. "Yes I fucking love you, ok?"

I fell to the side and drew my knees up, wrapping my arms around them and lowering my head. I fought the urge to give in to tears and shook without control as he sat up beside me and lit another cigarette. He handed it to me and I took it.

"Then don't ever tell me that again, to be a body without a soul. Don't ever tell me to do that. I can't and I won't. I'm not dead, I'm not dead…" he stammered off and became silent.

"It feels like that, sometimes, like we are," I answered.

"I'm not dead," he insisted again. "I am damned but not dead."

"So am I, baby, so am I," I answered and the clock ticked on, time, just time, a face on the water…


	6. Chapter 6

Rent Boyz

Chapter Six

It was dark. I couldn't be certain exactly what time it was. Jacob was asleep beside me and I sat up, reaching for him. It had become instinctual to do it, reach for him. I hated the hold he had over me. I had an unexplainable need to keep him and protect him from everyone; everyone, that is, except myself.

I lit a small candle on the table beside the pull out and reached for my cigarettes. Jacob didn't stir as I sat back against the headboard and regarded him. His face was bruised and swollen from where I'd hit him earlier. I traced the tip of one finger over the cuts, the bruises and swore under my breath. Why did I do it? What reason did I have to want so to hurt him? I knew that I projected all my own perceived weaknesses on him. I realized that I saw in him, in his submission to me, a mirror of my own shortcomings. All the years I'd tricked, suffered at the hands of abusive men, it was playing out right in front of me in the way I interacted with him.

When the phone rang I dropped my cigarette and jumped. I snatched the burning tip away from Jake's chest where it had fallen and shoved it angrily back into my mouth. I tripped twice on the way across the room to the phone and yanked it off the wall.

"Who the fuck is this?" I shouted into the receiver.

"It's Paul, Edward. Do you know where Jasper is? He didn't come home and I'm worried about him after what happened with Seth."

"No, I don't know where he is! What the hell time is it anyway and why was your fucking phone disconnected when I tried to call you yesterday?"

"I didn't have the money to pay for the bill until this morning. Ed, the boys, me, Jasper too… we're getting sick of your shit…"

"Fuck you, Paul. I'm through with all of you! You guys think you can trick on your own? Go ahead and try!"

"So it's true, then? You've replaced Jasper with some kid?"

"Paul, so help me, mind your damn business!" I shouted as I hung up the phone and stumbled back to Jacob.

"What was that about?" he asked as I snuggled up to him and slid my hand down over his tight belly.

"Nothing, Jake. Where's the lube? I want you," I whispered against his ear.

"Under the couch, same as always," he answered.

I reached under the pull out and fumbled around in the dark for the lube and screamed in terror when I felt a hand close around my wrist. "What the fuck?" I yelled as I was yanked onto the floor and someone, hiding beneath the pull out, tried to pull me under with them.

"Jacob! Somebody is hiding under the fucking couch!" I screamed.

He lunged up and was on the floor next to me in a second, pulling me back toward him. I got my wrist free and Jacob helped me to my feet. He yanked on the pull chain, illuminating the dark room in a blinding flash of white light.

"Get the fuck out from under there whoever you are!" I yelled as I backed away, keeping Jacob safety behind me.

I could hear muffled laughter and I recognized it at once. "Jasper, you bastard!" I cried as I shoved the pull out aside and grabbed at his exposed arm, dragging him out from under it.

He lay in the floor looking up at me. His hair was a dirty, straggling mess, his eyes blood-shot with dark bags beneath them. His clothes were filthy and he had dried blood on his t-shirt. He stared up at me like he didn't recognize me, his eyes wide and unfocused.

"Are you trying to get shanked, God damn it?" I yelled, kicking at his shin.

"Edward, when will you get it right? Do you think this boy will be your salvation? He's as fucked up as you, maybe even more so! You're losing your edge, baby. When you gonna learn?" he asked as he burst into uncontrollable laughter that sounded more suited to a mental hospital than the floor of my apartment.

"You're a fucking mess, Jasper! Paul just called me and he's wondering where the hell you are. You trying to piss off everyone so you got nowhere to go or something?" I asked. "Get up and go get cleaned up. You can borrow some of my clothes. Go across the hall and take a bath and wash your damn hair. I'll get you something to wear. Why do you look like shit? Did you decide you could get more tricks looking like the walking dead?"

"We're all in hell, Edward! Just open your eyes! We're all walking the devil's road and its follow the leader! The leader is you, Edward! The fucking Pied Piper of hell! Our father who art in hell and Edward be thy name, lead us all into temptation and deliver us unto evil! You held our lives in your hands and the sand ran through the hourglass grain by grain it slipped away… it slips away…" he finished staring off into space as though he was no longer sure of where he was.

I picked up the phone and called Paul. He answered after the second ring and I told him to get the hell over to my place and get Jasper before I threw him out into the street. Jasper lay like a dead thing not moving or blinking until Paul got there. He allowed Paul and Mike to help him up but as they were leading him away, he reached out and grabbed the front of Jacob's shirt and pulled him close.

"He's going to kill you, you know! He'll do it and you'll let him. Driven down, always enslaved to this hateful life, everyone weeps for you, for us but who will miss us when we lie stinking in the grave? No one!"

"Paul, get him out of here!" I shouted.

I slammed the door and locked it behind them, dragging the chain into place and sealing us from further intrusion. I leaned back against the door and regarded Jacob. He was silent as usual and stared back at me with that blank, flat affect. If I didn't know better, I'd have been certain he was unable to feel anything at all but I did know better.

"Jake, don't pay any attention to what he said, he's cracked," I tried to assure him.

"It doesn't matter, anyway, Edward," he answered as he sat down on the pull out. No one would miss us anyway."

"Don't say that, Jacob. If something happened to you, I'd… I'd… fuck it, I'd miss you!" I admitted.

He turned those dark, solemn eyes at me and sighed. "Remember you said that."

I pushed him back against the pull out and rolled my weight onto his hard body, forcing his mouth open and making him take my kiss whether or not he wanted it. He was pliant as usual, accepting but I could tell he wasn't feeling it. I could care less what he felt at that moment. I wanted him and I meant to have him.

"I'm getting that damn bottle of lube and you better be naked and ready when I get back into this bed!" I ordered him, and then got back down on the floor to rummage under the pull out. He was as I'd asked when I climbed back in but he was facing away from me and wouldn't meet my eyes.

"What the fuck's your problem?" I asked exasperated.

"I'm a murderer!" he cried and put his hands over his face. "Now I'm a prostitute and a murderer! What next? Should I rob some helpless old man or woman? Maybe go find some little girl to molest? What else can I do to pave my road to hell?"

"Stop that God damned self-pity! I don't want to hear it! We all make our fucking choices and you made yours now quit crying over it! You want to end up a drooling moron like Jasper?" I asked, scowling at him

He lay there, facing the wall; tears welled in his eyes and he refused to answer me. I sighed and reached for his shoulder forcing him to turn to me. "Babe, I'm sorry. It's been so messed up since… I don't know, it's always been messed up. I've been thinking that we, you and me, ought to just get away for a while. We can trick for a few days and save up the cash then go somewhere else. Maybe New Orleans? I've always wanted to see New Orleans. You ever been?" I asked, running my hands through his soft hair.

He sniffed and sat up beside me, leaning against the headboard. "No, I ain't never been there," he said, brushing the tears away with the back of his hand.

"Trust me, Jacob. I won't lead you astray," I whispered and as I said the words I felt as though someone had twisted a knife in my heart. I'd already led him astray and I was still doing it. He was lost just like me and it was exactly as Jasper had said. I was the Pied Piper of hell. I shook my head to dispel that thought and tugged at his boxer briefs.

"I want you, baby. Let's just screw the hell out of each other and forget about this shit for tonight. I'll make some calls in the morning and set up some work for both of us. No single calls, I'll be with you. We'll just take the money and head south. I'm sure we can find work there too. Maybe if you want, we could look for day jobs if that was something you wanted…"

"Yeah, let's do that, Edward. I want to go away from here. I hate this place," he admitted.

"So do I, baby; so do I," I answered as I reached for his cock. I began to stroke it firmly and as I did so, he turned to face me, his eyes large, fixed onto mine.

"Do you really love me?" he asked.

"Yes, I do."

"Why do you hit me, then?"

"I don't know. I can't help the violence sometimes. I'm sorry."

"That's what he always told me after he hurt me."

"Who?"

"My father."

"I'm not him, Jake."

"Aren't you? You hurt me like he did."

"I'm sorry."

"That's what he said."

I stilled him with my tongue in his mouth and then forced him over onto his belly. I wanted a little kink tonight and I knew how to get it. I retrieved the handcuffs from the bedside table drawer and pulled his wrists together behind his back and cuffed them. He twisted his head to look at me with fear in his eyes. I soothed him with my hands in his hair and leaned down to kiss him.

"I want it like this," I said and he swallowed hard but didn't protest.

I spread the lube all over my aching erection and leaned down to whisper in his ear. "Open those legs for me, baby. I want your tight ass. I need you. Don't know what you do to me baby, want you all the time. God," I moaned and clenched my teeth as the heat took me and I went nearly mad with desire.

He moaned beneath me as I pushed my fingers into him and rubbed firmly against his prostate. He began to grind against the mattress. I removed my fingers and replaced them with my hard cock. He pushed his face into the pillows to muffle his groans of pain and I rocked against him, loving the tightness, loving the fact that I could claim his this way.

"That's it, Jacob. Take it, take every inch of it. Feel me fucking that tight ass! Your mine, mine to own, to fuck, to play with, to use! Tell me you want it; tell me you like it when I use you this way! Tell me!"

"Oh, God!" he moaned and pushed up against me, sweat all over his skin, making me slide around on him. I loved it.

"Does it make you hard, baby? Do you know how hot you look in pain? Does it make you ache? Do you like that?" I asked, my voice deep and husky.

"Yes!" he cried as he lifted his head and tried to turn to face me. "Damn it, yes!"

"Fuck!" I gasped as I came hard into him, my body shaking, the blood thundering in my ears. "Mine, all mine!" I cried.

"Yours, and whose ever you choose to give me to," he said.

I rolled off him and reached for my cigarettes but left him cuffed and naked. The wind beat against the windows and howled beneath the eaves of the building but it couldn't get in to us. It couldn't hurt us. I stroked my hand along his back and gave his tight ass a hard smack. "Mine," I said again, wanting to assure myself as much as him that it was true.


	7. Chapter 7

Rent Boyz

Chapter Seven

Dawn had come rather unexpectedly, I thought, as I sat up on the side of the bed and reached for my cigarettes. It was still snowing. It was always snowing. I turned to find Jacob sleeping; his hands cuffed behind his back, just as I'd left him the night before. I retrieved the key, unlocked the cuffs and removed them, laying them aside on the table.

"Wake up, Jake," I said as I ran my hand through his hair.

He stretched and rolled over onto his back, looking up at me. I handed him a cigarette and lit it for him. "I'm going to make some calls today and set up some tricks for us. You and me are going to work it pretty hard for the next couple days then we're busting outa here. I got a line on a couple jobs for us later today. That fucking dentist called this morning and he's dying to get his hands back on you again. I told him to fuck off but if you're willing to try it again, he promised to pay us a thousand bucks for the chance to fuck you. I told him if you agreed, I'd have to stay in the room and watch that he don't fuck with you. You willing?" I asked.

He glanced up at me then sat up against the headboard of the bed, exhaling slowly. "You'll stay in the room and watch him?" he asked.

"Sure thing, I ain't letting nobody put their paws on you again without me being there to be sure it's safe." I assured him.

He sighed and shook his head, frowning. "I just don't know…" he said.

"Look, Jacob, if you don't want to do him I get it but think about the money. If we can work just a couple more tricks like that then we'll have enough money to blow this crap shoot and get outa here for good. Don't you want to go to New Orleans?"

"Yes, I do want to get away from here but I just don't know if I can do what you're asking of me. Remember what happened with Emmett? I was so scared. When you told me I had to dance, I thought I was gonna piss myself."

"You did just fine, baby," I cooed to him as I slid closer and brushed his hair back from his face. "I was as turned on as he was watching you do that little, cock-tease of a dance. Damn, Jacob but you sure can get a dick hard and you didn't even touch him to do it. Maybe we could just have you go dance at a club and get the tips. Wada ya say?"

"Well fuck that! It was embarrassing enough doing it here for you and Emmett. I'd never be able to do it in front of a crowd."

"Don't sweat it, sweetheart. Just go with me and do what I tell you to do. Block it all out like I do and pretend… hell, pretend whatever you have to. Just know it won't be forever. We're going to get away and start over. You'll see. I promise you," I whispered as I leaned over and took his cigarette away from him, putting it in the ash tray beside mine. I pushed my tongue into his mouth and twisted it around his roughly, waiting for him to respond. When he did, I knew I'd won him over with my arguments.

I stood in front of the mirror again, cleaning up and shaving in preparation for our meeting with the Tooth Fairy. I grinned at myself, pleased with my ability to get Jacob to do whatever I asked him to do. I was the fucking king of manipulation. That was all this was. I didn't really love him. Whatever I'd told him last night was just what he needed to hear. I was too strong for that shit, love, emotions. Put it aside and bury it. Fuck that crap. I didn't need it.

He was ready when I got back to the room. He was fuck hot as usual. I'd picked out a black, button up shirt and dark jeans for him and he was wearing a pair of Paul's old, biker boots that had been left at my place. They were just a tad too big for him but no one would notice. He smelled like sex and he looked like trouble but with a side of innocence thrown in. Perfect for the pervy dentist. He would go ape shit over Jake tonight.

I coached him as we drove across town. "Now remember, baby, act real shy and afraid of everything. He gets off on that and remember, I'm right there watching. He can't hurt you if I'm there."

Jacob was silent as the grave. He didn't say a word and that had me slightly concerned. I hoped he wouldn't freak on me like Jasper apparently had. Jasper! Christ! I would have to call Paul and try to find out what the hell was wrong with that bitch. He was one of my best tricks. I was sort of attached to him in a fucked up way. He'd saved my life once when a guy had tried to shank me for some money. Jasper had hit the prick over the head with a beer bottle and we'd gotten away. If he hadn't done that, I'd probably be worm fodder by now.

We walked through the dark, lobby and entered the elevator. Jacob was still quiet and seemed resigned. I took that as a good sign. Hopefully that son of a bitch upstairs wouldn't try anything stupid like last time. When he opened the door of the apartment for us, Jacob walked inside without me having to push him.

The dentist stood back a bit and eyed me suspiciously. "So, are you planning on busting my face again, Edward?" he asked.

"Not as long as you play by the rules I set on the phone. Nothing fucked up, just vanilla with Jacob. He's a baby, remember? I stay in the room cause he wants me too and you are fucking fine with that, aren't you?" I asked.

"Yeah, I guess…" he said.

"So, where do you want to do this?" I asked.

"My bedroom, bring him and have him get naked. I'll be right there. I need to get a condom and a bottle of wine. Just have him get on the bed when he's done."

I took Jacob's hand and led him to the bedroom, closing the door after us. "Get undressed, baby," I said, feeling that tightening sensation in my chest. I was not liking this at all but Jacob seemed almost numb to it. Had it happened that quickly, the resignation, the acceptance of it, and this life? It had taken me a bit longer to get used to it but what the hell? If he was ok with it then shouldn't I be? Maybe that was what had me miffed. Maybe I didn't' want him to be ok with it. Maybe I liked it when he only wanted me.

Jacob turned away from me and unbuttoned his shirt, slipping it off his shoulders and laying it on a chair. He sat down and took off the boots and his socks, then stood back up and unsnapped his jeans, slowly sliding the zipper down. He looked up at me and I swallowed hard, bothered by the fact that I couldn't turn away.

"See something you like, Ed?" he asked in a deep, husky voice.

"Fuck…" I gasped.

"Too damn bad. You gave me to him tonight. Guess you'll just have to sit there and watch while he makes me suck his dick, then shoves it up my ass!"

Ok, he obviously wasn't resigned to it. Somehow, his angry words didn't have the stinging effect he'd hoped they would. Instead of making me angry, they gave me hope. Fuck this! Why did I care? I shrugged and sat down in the chair. He shucked his boxers and climbed up into the big bed, slipping under the comforter.

The Tooth Fairy made his entrance, carrying a bottle of wine and two glasses, a condom clenched in his teeth. Sheesh, what a fucking prick to walk in like that! Jacob narrowed his eyes and took a deep breath but said nothing. I tried to make myself as inconspicuous as possible, tilting my chair sideways so I could watch the Van Halen video playing on MTV in the other room and still keep one eye on what he was doing to Jake.

He sat the bottle and glasses down on the bedside table and spit the condom down next to them. He reached up to loosen his tie and slid it off, then began to unbutton his shirt and pull it from his dress pants. I glanced aside at him, and then back at the TV. I couldn't' bring myself to even look at Jake.

"So, kid, how old are you again?" he asked, though he knew quite well.

"I'm 16, sir," Jacob replied, lowering his eyes as he did, trying to act shy like I'd told him to.

"What grade are you in?"

"I don't go to school anymore, sir."

"Oh, why is that?"

"I killed my dad so I ran away from home."

I spun around in the chair, my eyes bugging out of my head as I stared at Jacob but I quickly recovered myself and laughed out loud. "Good one, Jacob. I told you to act like a kid, not a killer. Get it right, you ain't here to scare him!"

The Tooth Fairy hadn't really taken him seriously. It still pissed me off that Jake had said that. What kind of game was he playing anyway?

"So, what do you like to do with your spare time, kido?" the perv asked as he kicked off his shoes and pulled his socks off one at a time. I watched him stand up and unfasten his belt and I stiffened, remembering what he'd done with it last time.

Jacob, apparently remembering too, reached up and pushed the dentist's hands away, unfastening the belt himself and yanking it through the loops, then tossing it over to me. I got the hint and picked it up off the floor, tucking it into the chair behind me.

"I used to like to play basketball, go fishing, you know, typical stuff," Jacob answered.

The dentist stripped his pants off and stood in his boxers a moment, glancing nervously at me before he pushed them down, his hard cock springing up to attention. He reached down and wrapped his hand around it, stroking slowly as he looked at Jacob. "Come over here and wrap those sexy lips around this, little boy. I want to feel that mouth on me. I haven't been able to forget how good it felt since…" he wisely decided to end that thought before it went any further.

Jacob scooted closer to him and glanced over at me as he wrapped his hand around the base of the dentist's cock, then leaned down and took it into his mouth. I swiveled in my chair so I could watch. I wasn't interested in what Adam Curry was saying on MTV anymore. I could care less what band was going to open this evenings Head Banger's Ball. All I cared about was what that bastard was doing to my Jacob.

I watched feeling increasingly helpless and miserable as the prick pushed Jake off and told him to get on his belly in the bed for him. Jacob looked over at me, almost beseechingly. He kept his eyes on me while that asshole got his condom on and lubed it up with spit. Jacob didn't look away, not even when the deviant bastard impaled him. I winched in pain right along with him, my Jacob, my baby…

"Yeah, fuck yeah he's so tight! Oh God, I want to… I need to…"

I couldn't listen to this shit. I wanted to get up and cross the room and grab him, throw him off Jacob, shut him up for good. He was getting rough with it, shoving Jacob against the bed with each thrust. Jacob kept his black eyes on me, watching me watching him, wanting me to get up and stop it but I didn't. I didn't.

I counted the money as we headed down in the elevator. Jacob had been crying when the Tooth Fairy got off him. I'd tried to help him into the bathroom where he could get cleaned up but he pushed me off. I didn't care if he was pissed. We'd made, or rather he'd made a cool, thousand bucks. That along with what we'd made from Emmett, gave us nearly two thousand. Couple more tricks like this and we'd be solid gone. Or at least I would be. I was starting to wonder if I wanted to take Jake along. I didn't like the way I was starting to feel about him. This caring thing was getting in the way. Maybe I could just sneak off on my own… I knew I wouldn't. Those days of riding solo were long gone and it was fantasy to think that way anymore.

He followed me up the stairs to our apartment and walked over to the pull out while I locked the door behind us. I went to the cigar box on top of the television and put my cash into it, then reached for a cigarette and lit it. As I blew out the smoke I saw him advancing toward me with a vicious look on his face.

"I'm going to kill you," he said, his head down, his eyes filled with tears.

I took a step back and reached for my switchblade knife. "You fucking try it," I answered, my voice having its usual hard, cruel undertone.

"You're just using me…"

"Jacob, you know that's not true! I could have left you there with him and let him do whatever to you but I stayed and watched and fuck! It was hard to watch that. I wanted to stop it. I really did…"

"No you didn't! You just sat there and watched him hurt me! If you really loved me you wouldn't have even asked me to go back there, to him. How could you just sit there, Edward? How?"

"Fuck you, Jacob! I did what I had to do! You did what you had to do! Do you wanna get away or what? If you do then stop this shit! Quit whining about it like a little fucking girl! You knew this was how it was gonna play out! Don't you fucking come at me like that saying shit like that! So help me, Jacob…" I stammered off. I was scared. I was actually scared. He wasn't backing down.

I watched him as he took another step toward me. My hand stayed in my jacket pocket wrapped around my switchblade. I knew I could pull it out in less than a second if I had to. His face was twisted into a scowl, his eyelashes spiked with dried tears. His eyes were wild, just like Jasper… Fuck!

"Jacob, calm down…"

"Just like my father. I begged him to stop, I pleaded with him when he hurt me. Why does everyone want to hurt me? I wasn't a bad kid! Was I bad? Was I evil when I was born? Why? Why couldn't I be loved? Why, Edward?"

"Jacob, step back, I'm warning you…"

The clock ticked on, second, second, second, into minute, minute, minute…

"I didn't want to kill him. I don't want to kill you. Edward, don't do this to me again. Please, don't, I'm begging you," he cried, holding his hands out toward me.

"Jacob, stay back, you are not thinking straight. Go sit down on the couch…"

"I love you, loved you… I tried, God I tried, Jasper tried, we all tried, why can't you stop? Why can't you stop hurting us? Please, I can't do this anymore. I want it to end, just end. Hell can't be any worse than this. Stop hurting me!"

He lunged at me and I don't know, it just happened. He was trying to reach for me but I thought… I thought…

I stood over him, looking down at the blood, all the blood, running across the floor boards, soaking into the cracks in the wood, saturating the throw rug. I stood over him holding the knife, stained with blood, his blood. I screamed.

The door flung open against the wall and I turned around. Charlie Swan stood there, shadowed against the dim hall light. He shook his head as he looked at Jacob lying at my feet, bleeding out on the floor. The clock ticked and the snow beat against the window and I knew, I realized, I'd been here before, I'd seen it all before.

"_I want it to end, just end… Why can't you stop hurting us? When will you get it right? Why don't you ever speak to me? You had our lives in your hands like slipping through the hourglass, one grain at a time…"_

I stared around me in horror as the apartment changed before my eyes. Large holes appearing in the walls, the floor, old, dried wood, the television gone, the phone a hole in the wall where it had been, the kitchen sink everything, gone. I looked up and saw holes in the roof, birds nesting there.

"No, no, it can't be, it fucking can't be…" I screamed, knowing full well that it was.

"It is, Edward. Twenty five years, boy, twenty five years since you killed him. He just wanted to be loved. They all just wanted to be loved. You couldn't stop. You couldn't just love them. You had to always win, always win. Why, Edward? He only wanted to love you. Jasper only wanted to love you."

A newspaper rolled across the floor toward me and I reached down and picked it up. A fire, across town at the apartment where Paul and the others were staying. Suspected arson, dead, all of them, Paul, Jasper, Mike, Riley, all of them, dead and gone and Jacob, sweet, Jacob, lying on the floor at my feet. I looked down, desiring to hold him in my arms one last time but he was gone. Gone, all of them gone.

"How many times will we all have to repeat this, Edward? How many times until you get it right? Over and over we have to keep reliving it! I'm tired, Edward, we are all tired. We just want to go to wherever it is we have to go. I don't want to stay here and keep haunting this place for ever. Try again. Try again."

I watched as he walked to the center of the room and reached for the chord of the single light that hung there. I stared in horror as he climbed up on a discarded box and wrapped that chord around his neck. He reached into the pocket of his faded, olive-drab jacket and pulled out a gun. He tossed it across the room to me and it slid on the floor at my feet.

"One more time, Edward. One more time and this time, get it right."

"Charlie, no, don't!" I screamed as he kicked the box away and went swinging wildly in the air. I ran across the room and tried to catch him, pull him up but my arms closed around nothing, emptiness, just like this room, this old room.

Twenty five years ago, January 23rd, 1987, I'd killed my lover Jacob Black in this room, this God forsaken room. Charlie Swan, being just outside in the hall, had heard the commotion and come inside. He had gone down to the basement and hung himself from the rafters, the shock of seeing all that blood, throwing him back to the war, back to the bloodshed he'd witnessed there.

A fire had been started by Jasper Whitlock in the apartment where he was staying. He'd lost his mind and no longer wanted to live. He'd killed himself and all of them, my boys. They were all dead because of me. Emmett was there with them. He'd been visiting Paul and Jasper had locked them all in the room with him. They couldn't get out. Seth was already dead and gone but he too had been a casualty of mine, blood on my hands, my hands…

I reached down and picked up the gun, the same gun that Charlie had tossed as me when he'd left the apartment to go hang himself. I lifted it and put it to my temple. It was purgatory, over and over, purgatory, for me, for them. "God please, don't make me do it anymore, please, please, please…" I pulled the trigger…

The winter is cold in Indianapolis, Indiana. The wind can cut you as deeply as it does in more notorious climates like Chicago. I'd never been to Chicago. I doubted if I would ever go there. The farthest away from Indie I'd ever been was St. Louis. I liked St. Louis. Maybe someday I'd go back there.

As I rounded the corner to the building, a shabby, derelict brownstone on a corner lot, I saw him crouched down between the front steps and a dumpster.

I stood in front of him, my hands on my hips. "What's your name?" I asked him.

"Jacob Black," he mumbled.

"How old are you?" I asked.

"Sixteen," he answered.

I felt kind of sorry for the kid, homeless like that. I don't know what it was but something about him was so familiar, warm it threw me off guard and felt kind of like dejavu. I stepped away from him and headed toward the stairs. Then, at the last minute, I turned back.

"You coming or what?" I asked.


	8. Chapter 8

Rent Boyz

Chapter Eight

Charlie Swan sat just inside the door watching. He did not look up when Edward Cullen passed him. He did glance up at Jacob Black. He mouthed a single word to the young man; "time".

Charlie knew he was breaking the rules by communicating with either of them. He'd been charged only with being a "silent watcher", a guardian angel of sorts. He was tired of just watching. He couldn't bear to go through it again. How many countless times had he been over this same scene? How many more times would he have to go through it with them? When would they all have suffered enough to have paid for their lives sins?

He'd been given a chance to work off his sins by agreeing to sit and watch. He'd been promised a chance at heaven if he would endure purgatory first. Of course he'd agreed. Now, he was wondering if this existence was worse than what might have been waiting for him in hell.

"Time," would Jacob get it this time? Would he remember what it signified before the same nightmare happened again? Charlie could only hope and pray that he would. He sighed and drew his knees up, wrapping his arms around them and staring out into the blowing snow.

"Hey, Jasper, this is Jacob. He's gonna stay with us for a while," I said as I opened the door and ushered the young man inside my ratty, one room apartment.

"Damn, Ed, he sure looks young. How old are you, kid?" Jasper asked.

Jacob glanced up at me, then lowered his head and shoved his hands in his pockets before answering. "I'm 16."

"Whoa, Edward! Are you planning on tricking him out?" Jasper asked.

"No, I think he's a little young for that, don't you?" I asked. I could tell from the stunned look on Jasper's face that he thought I'd gone mad.

"Ed, have you taken leave of your good senses?" How do you plan on supporting him?" he asked.

"I'll trick if I have to. I ain't gonna be responsible for him getting into this lifestyle too," I answered.

It felt so strange to be having this conversation. Like I'd been having it over and over with Jasper. That cunt could be so frustrating to deal with sometimes but he was my favorite of all the boys I pimped.

I'd had a very strange feeling that day when I'd walked past an old church. The manger scene outside reminded me of a time when my mom had taken me to a Christmas Eve service at a Catholic Church. I'd loved the music, the candles and the incense. As I stood outside that church, I felt a kind of peace settling over me. I hadn't ever felt anything like that before. I wanted to hold onto that feeling. When I'd seen that boy kneeling in the snow beside the dumpster, that feeling came back and I knew I had to help him.

"Jacob, are you hunger?" I asked.

"Yeah," he mumbled as he sat down on the pull out.

"Jasper, why don't you make yourself useful and go get us a pizza? I'll call it in," I ordered as I tossed him the keys to the Honda.

"Sure, sure," he mumbled as he got up and pulled his coat on. I stood watching him walk away, then turned to Jacob.

He was staring at the clock with his head tilted to one side, his eyes narrowed. I turned toward the clock to see what had him so mesmerized and froze. I was overcome with a sudden sense of dejavu as I watched the second hand moving slowly around the clock face. The room seemed to shimmer and fade a bit and I felt nauseous and dizzy. I could smell the unmistakable scent of blood and feel my heart breaking.

"_No, not again, Jacob, please! No, please, please, don't make me do it all over again…"_

I gasped and reached for a chair to steady myself. "Christ!" I stammered. "What the hell was that shit?"

Jacob was looking at me with a placid expression; such a strange boy, so quiet. I wondered about his past, what had brought him to my doorstep. I stood up, shaking my head to clear that strange, little vision. It must have been a drug flashback or something.

"So, kid, what's your story?" I asked.

He lowered his eyes again and swallowed hard, then cleared his throat. "You don't really want to know," he said quietly.

"If I didn't want to know, then I wouldn't have asked, now spill it!" I encouraged as I lit a cigarette and offered him the pack and lighter. He took one and lit it, then handed them back to me and as he exhaled the smoke, he lifted his eyes to mine and I noticed how sad, how utterly melancholy he seemed. It struck a kind of deep chord in me and I couldn't help but feel that I knew him from somewhere.

I was seized with another of those odd feelings as the room shifted around me and I saw him, Jacob, standing in front of the television, facing me and Emmett. Jacob was dancing for us. He was giving it his all, making it sexy. "Fuck, Jacob! Do I know you from somewhere? I keep getting this feeling that I do. You ever been here before?"

He just sat staring back at me, his head tilted to one side for what seemed like an eternity before he answered. "Time is a face on the water, Edward. Do you hear it? It ticks for you and me, for all of us." He turned back to the clock and I followed his eyes.

I couldn't shake the feeling that this had all happened before. There was a sudden knock on the door and I heard Jasper outside asking me to take the chain off. I shook my head again and walked over to the door, trying to steady my shaking hands to open it.

"I forgot my wallet. Did you call it in yet?" Jasper asked as he picked his wallet up off the kitchen table and stuffed it into his back pocket.

"Call what in?" I snapped.

"The fucking pizza Ed!" he retorted.

"Damn," I muttered and reached for the phone.

I dialed the number I knew by heart and gave the girl our order.  
"Two large pizza's loaded, yeah, Jasper will be in to get it." When I hung up the phone, I noticed Jacob was still staring at the clock.

I walked over to him and knelt down in front of him; putting my hands on either side of his face and making him look at me. "I know you, don't I?" I asked again.

"Yes," he answered.

"How do I know you? Where have we met? Did you turn tricks for someone I know?" I asked, still holding his face, making him look at me.

"You know me, Edward. We used to be… we used to…" he stammered off and became silent. "What was I saying?" he asked me, his expression completely confused.

"You said I knew you and then you said, "we used to," but never finished. We used to what, Jacob."

"I don't know. I feel so confused. I feel like time is standing on its head. I feel trapped. God, I feel so trapped!" he gasped.

"Shh, it's ok. No one is hurting you," I said soothingly and moved to sit beside him on the pull out. I put my arm around him and as soon as I did, he curled up to me, his head on my shoulder. When the scent of him, his skin, and his hair hit my nostrils, I knew, without a doubt, that we had been lovers and yet I could call to mind no memory of it.

I closed my eyes as my hand moved slowly down his back, under the light jacket he wore, beneath the thin, thread bare t-shirt.

"_I killed my father… No please don't make me do this… Do you love me at all…? I'll kill myself if you do… Please don't rape me…"_

I slid my hand up to the back of his neck and turned him to face me. He was crying and I felt like I would too. He leaned close and brushed his lips, full and soft, against my mouth and I drew him even closer, sliding my tongue into that mouth, knowing full well it wasn't the first time I'd ever kissed this handsome, beguiling and pitiful stranger.

His arms came around me, pulled at me. I eased us both back against the mattress, confused at my feelings. I didn't sleep with complete strangers unless they were paying me. I sure as hell couldn't explain all this bizarre stuff. How could I possibly know him? How was it that I was certain he'd been abused and that when I took off his clothes I'd see the signs of it? How did I know that he'd killed his father; strangled the man in his sleep? How? Nothing made sense at that point.

"Edward," he moaned against my mouth and I kissed him again, hard and possessively.

"What, Jacob?" I asked.

"Time, we're running out of… time…"

I saw him tilt his head and look up at the clock again. "What the hell is it with that damn clock, Jacob?" I asked in exasperation, my body wanting to be naked and joined with him, this beautiful stranger in my bed.

"Charlie said… time… Charlie said… what? Where am I?"

"Jacob, are you alright?"

"No, I'm not ok. I'm not ok…"

I tugged at his t-shirt, pulling it over his head and tossing it to the floor, and then reached for the snap on his jeans. "No," he whimpered and I considered going right ahead and having him. It was certainly my way. I felt entitled but I didn't. I held off.

"Jacob, tell me what's wrong with you. How do I know you? Why does it feel like coming home to have you in my arms? Tell me!" I begged.

"Time, Edward, time is a face on the water…" he trailed off, looking dazed.

I got up and sat on the side of the bed, holding my head in my hands. The room was spinning again. I stood and tried to make my way over to the clock. I was going to throw the damn thing out the window. It was one of those old, heavy, wooden wall clocks from the 70's when things were made to last forever. I reached up as the floor rocked and seemed to shift under me… glimpse of the room with boarded up windows, holes in the roof… shift back to the way it looked now. I shook that visual away as I turned the clock around to remove the batteries. That was when I saw it.

"_Edward, remember it. Remember me! Remember all of it! We are in hell! Only you can set us free! Time is a loop that never ends. Over and over!" _

Words, carved carefully into the back of the wooden clock. I dropped the clock and it shattered into pieces on the floor. The door to the apartment opened and I looked up to see Charlie standing in it. Memories began to rush back to me, scenes, faces, sounds and it struck me in the gut. Jacob had been right. He'd been the one to carve this. How many years had we been trapped here? How long had we been stuck in purgatory, repeating the same things over and over? I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned to see Jacob. He was smiling.

"You finally understand. You finally did it right. Oh, God, maybe we can go now! Charlie, can we go now?" he asked, turning to face Charlie who still stood in the open door.

I looked past Charlie and saw them, all of them standing in the hall with him, Jasper, Emmett, Seth, Mike, Paul, Riley, all my boys. They were smiling and beaconing to Jacob and me to join them. I felt Jacob's hand close around mine and he leaned against me.

"Let's go, Edward," he whispered into my ear.

The apartment began to disappear around us. I felt warm, not hot, just warm and comfortable. I could see a bright light, just behind them, my boys and Charlie. I felt drawn to it, as if all the answers to all of life's questions waited in that light. I grasped Jacob's hand tighter and turned to look down at him.

"Will be still be together on the other side?" I asked.

"Yes, Edward, you will be with him. You've earned heaven, now let's go in," Charlie urged us.

I stepped toward that light, taking Jacob with me, pulling him with me. I felt it envelop us, surround us. So much calm, so much peace. It was over, the dark and the cold, the misery. It was done. We'd made it.

Jacob looked up at me and smiled. "I love you," he said.

"I love you too, Jacob," I whispered as we stepped through the door and into the light.

The End

Authors Note: Ok, so I did give them an HEA! Sue me!


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